"The Rumor Busters"

Salon.com has an interview with Barbara Mikkelson, who along with her husband runs Snopes.com, the Urban Legends Reference Pages, in which she discusses the recent rumors and e-mail hoaxes surrounding the events of September 11. Recommended reading for us all.

Okay, one more...

"Good Evening and welcome. This website is all about the paranormal and the unexplained, here you will find true ghost stories, articles on U.F.O's and Aliens, plus do werewolves, ghosts and other unexplained and supernatural things exist? There is a large collection of horror clipart, graphics and lots of horror midi music files to listen to. There is also a dedicated paranormal directory with links to many other sites of that and other genre. "

"Horror Find is the first search engine dedicated to all horror all the time. It is the ultimate source for horror and halloween, with listings of sites about halloween, halloween products, halloween props horror, horror movies, werewolves, vampires, witches, ghosts, demons, monsters, haunted places, haunted parks, haunted attractions, ghost walks, black magic, magic in general, evil spells, zombies and all sorts of other horror related stuff.."

Pass the popcorn, please.



Like many people, I like to watch scary movies on Halloween. In no particular order, here are some of my favorite spine-tinglers:

1. John Carpenter's "Halloween" - anyone who has ever done any bit of babysitting can appreciate this one. This is the one that gave birth the the slasher movie, and there are few that can rival it. If you have Cinemax, it's on tonight at 11:30!
2. "Silence of the Lambs" - not officially a horror film, but nevertheless seriously creepy.
3. "The Sentinel" - 70s horror film about a fashion model who rents an apartment in an old NYC apartment building, only to find that it resides over the entrance to Hell. Not Oscar-caliber stuff, but the cast alone makes it worth seeing - Chris Sarandon, Ava Gardner, Burgess Meredith, Christopher Walken and many more. It's a bit campy, but it has some truly horrifying scenes.
4. Francis Ford Coppola's "Dracula" - Gary Oldman rules. I could have done without both Keanu Reeves and Winona Ryder in this, but Oldman's portrayal of Count Dracula and the creepy makeup and sets make up for the two of them.
5. "Rosemary's Baby" - a classic and it's got Ruth Gordon in it.

What are some of your favorite scary movies?

Mummy Dearest

Time for a timely personality test: What's your Monster Match? My results:

Mummy

You've been dead for 3000 years, but you are still the life of the party because your monster match is the mummy. Has anyone ever told you that you look sharp in linen, and white is definitely your color? From head to toe, you are the best dressed of the zombie clan. You throw the best parties this side of the Nile, whether you rented out a suite at the Luxor or you're just chilling in your tomb, you know how to unwind and have a good time.

You put the "Rahhh" back in Rock and Roll and forget hip-hop, you're the original wrap artist. But mummies, you may need to get outside more. You could use some sun and that sarcophagus is starting get a little stuffy. Go for a walk (like an Egyptian) or maybe even a jog. It's important to have an outlet so life's details don't bury you alive.

Badump, bump!

Scary X-Files

I drew up this list last year at Halloween time and figured it might be worth a second look -

20 Moments From The X-Files That Scared The Crap Out of Me.

Happy Halloween!

The precautionary candy's in the bowl and I'm ready for trick-or-treaters, although we will most likely have none. In the five and a half years we have been here, we have seen neither ghost nor goblin on Halloween. With that in mind, I bought candy that I like.

Whatever happened to...

Charlie Bucket from "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory"?

"Halloween's origins date back to the ancient Celtic festival of Samhain (pronounced sow-in). The Celts, who lived 2,000 years ago in the area that is now Ireland, the United Kingdom, and northern France, celebrated their new year on November 1. This day marked the end of summer and the harvest and the beginning of the dark, cold winter, a time of year that was often associated with human death. Celts believed that on the night before the new year, the boundary between the worlds of the living and the dead became blurred. On the night of October 31, they celebrated Samhain, when it was believed that the ghosts of the dead returned to earth. In addition to causing trouble and damaging crops, Celts thought that the presence of the otherworldly spirits made it easier for the Druids, or Celtic priests, to make predictions about the future. For a people entirely dependent on the volatile natural world, these prophecies were an important source of comfort and direction during the long, dark winter.."

U2 in NYC

"No rock band's body of work seemed more appropriate for the occasion. U2's songs have often ached with suffering and loss, from "One Tree Hill" to "Peace on Earth" ("They're reading names out over the radio/All the folks the rest of us won't get to know/ ... Their lives are bigger than any big idea.") And some of their music is a direct rebuttal to the cycle of terror and revenge that has wracked their own land ever since they were boys. When, in the middle of "Sunday Bloody Sunday," Bono screamed, "I'm so sick of it," his anguish seemed to resonate throughout the arena, although New York's suffering has decades to go before it matches Belfast's. "

He says it much better than I do.

How Lo Can You Go?

"Though J.Lo was at the studio for only 90 minutes, her people insisted on a few "important details" to "ensure a more comfortable stay for the artist and her entourage." Such as? A 45-foot trailer "with triple slide outs and 2 entry doors" (though she'd settle for a 40-footer in a pinch) and equipped with a CD player ("NO EXCEPTIONS"), a TV/VCR, a "hair sink and make-up station" and an assortment of CDs, including the work of artists like Macy Gray, D'Angelo, Toni Braxton and Destiny's Child. "

Oh, it gets worse.

And in related news...

Now, we've all been watching a lot of the news lately, and I for one know that I am in need of some serious massage therapy to repair the crick in my neck resulting from attempts to read that damn scrolling text at the bottom of the screen while simultaneously trying to listen to the latest anthrax/terrorism/military expert talking head who happens to be expounding at the time. What I find most annoying, though, is the need that news organizations feel to give a name to the current crisis. We've all seen them - "America Under Attack"; "America Fights Back"; "America On Guard". Alright already! We know what's going on. This is not a movie or television show - we don't need a title. By titling their coverage of the crisis they reduce it to yet another form of entertainment, a current events soap opera. Of course, that's just my opinion. I could be wrong. (nod to Mr. Miller).

Never fear, news-weary citizens - those crazy kids over at Comedy Central's The Daily Show have come up with the perfect title/graphic:


image courtesy comedycentral.com

I'm still smiling.

October 31 Hoax

Press release from the FBI website:

"An anonymous internet electronic-mail (e-mail) message has been widely circulated pertaining to an Arab male who warned his wife not to fly on September 11, 2001 and not to go to any shopping mall on October 31, 2001. The e-mail further states that the Arab male disappeared prior to the September 11, 2001 attacks.

The FBI has conducted an inquiry into the source of this e-mail and determined that the alleged threat is not credible."

I received this e-mail a few weeks ago. I was pretty sure that it was a hoax, but these days it is better to be safe than sorry. I didn't forward the message on to my friends but I thought I should do something, just in case. So there I was, in the middle of the night, trying to figure out how to forward it on to the FBI without actually having to call them. In the end I sent it with an explanation to the DOJ e-mail address since you cannot currently e-mail the FBI. I never did hear back from anyone, but it is comforting to see that all possible threats are being given careful consideration.

"Google is considering offering premium subscription services as a way of boosting its revenues. "

Ah, shit.

Jinkies!

The costumes are finished and waiting to be donned for tonight's Halloween Party. The hosts and most of the guests are theater people, a fairly creative lot who rarely disappoint. Sheila and I will be going as Daphne and Velma, respectively. The rest of the Scooby gang will be represented by a Scooby and a Shaggy doll. We told Fred to bugger off.

One of the funniest movies ever made was on AMC last night. It's that time of year and Monsterfest has begun. I never really understood why the horse whinnied every time Frau Bluecher's name was mentioned - I just thought they were being silly. I was wrong:

"Bluecher means glue in German. Since glue is made from horses, horses are heard each time the name of Frau Bluecher is said."

Aha!

For weeks after the terrorist attacks, secretaries at the New York State Office of Children and Family Services and press officers at the city's Administration for Children's Services could hardly answer the telephone without hearing from people who had read news of the "many," "hundreds," even "thousands" of orphans left in need of a home by the Sept. 11 disaster.

The problem is, officials say, there are none. Not a single child who needs foster care or adoption by strangers. Not a single documented case of a child who lost both parents. Just a handful of verified cases in which children "lost their only parent" — and all have close relatives who have taken over their care.

I just saw this guy on the television last week.

Here's another one for ya, Hol!

Oh, GOD.

Holly, this one's for you.

Not for the squeamish. Believe me, I know.

I am 23% Punk.




That's pretty much what I figured. I toyed with piercing, ear cuffs and crazy hairdos in the 80s, but never really embraced the whole movement, if ya get my drift. Take the PUNK/POSER Test at Fuali.com. The questions themselves are worth the time.

[link courtesy silly cow]

Peace on Earth.

When I first began blogging, I made a vow to myself that I would never post poetry or song lyrics; it just isn't me. Well, I'm about to break that vow. I was listening to U2's All That You Can't Leave Behind" yesterday and I was struck with the timeliness of one of the songs. Written by a band that is all too familiar with the devastating impact of terrorism on a society, it reflects the irony-tinged hopefulness of the war-weary. The song was written in the aftermath of the car bombing in Omagh, Northern Ireland in 1998 that killed 29 people, mostly women and children; in the aftermath of over 30 years of Troubles and 300 years of political and religious strife.

Peace on Earth

Heaven on Earth
We need it now
I'm sick of all of this
Hanging around
Sick of sorrow
Sick of pain
Sick of hearing again and again
That there's gonna be
Peace on Earth

Where I grew up
There weren't many trees
Where there was we'd tear them down
And use them on our enemies
They say that what you mock
Will surely overtake you
And you become a monster
So the monster will not break you

It's already gone too far
Who said that if you go in hard
You won't get hurt

Jesus could you take the time
To throw a drowning man a line
Peace on Earth
Tell the ones who hear no sound
Whose sons are living in the ground
Peace on Earth
No whos or whys
No one cries like a mother cries
For Peace on Earth
She never got to say goodbye
To see the color in his eyes
Now he's in the dirt
That's Peace on Earth

They're reading names out over the radio
All the folks the rest of us won't get to know
Sean and Julia, Gareth, Ann and Breda
Their lives are bigger, than any big idea

Jesus can you take the time
To throw a drowning man a line
Peace on Earth
To tell the ones who hear no sound
Whose sons are living in the ground
Peace on Earth

Jesus this song you wrote
The words are sticking in my throat
Peace on Earth
Hear it every Christmas time
But hope and history won't rhyme
So what's it worth?
This peace on Earth.

Copyright U2, Lyrics: Bono, Music: U2

Here's a little teaser photo from my vacation in Maine last month. As soon as I get my site moved from the old PC and install my HTML editor on the new comp, I'll work on getting other photos posted.

XPerience tells me...

...it might be best to wait a bit on this. c|net has a load of articles regarding the release of Microsoft's new OS. I got a free XP upgrade coupon with the computer that will be redeemable in a couple of weeks so yes, watchout lemmings, here I come.

[the startup wav for XP should be the intro to Madonna's "Ray of Light", like in the commercials...gets me in a groove every time]

New and Improved.

I took delivery of a new toy today, my first new computer - a Dell Dimension 4300. So far, so good. Of course, buying a new computer while still out of work is probably not the smartest move, but hey, I never claimed to be all that smart.

Not that you guys will see any improvement on your end...especially since I'm having that same difficulty with publishing that I had last week. Grr.

"Gaydar, or gay radar, billed as the first portable interactive electronic icebreaker/matchmaker for gay men and lesbians, ends the guesswork about the sexual orientation of that person across the room."

Fun idea, as long as your local gay-basher doesn't get his hands on it.

Fametracker: The Farmer's Almanac of Celebrity Worth. Hours of bubble-bursting goodness.

[link courtesy textism]

For whose Benefit?

I watched the Concert for NYC this weekend. All 5 and a half hours of it. It had its moments of schlock, sub-par performances (most notably McCartney's new song "Freedom") and boorish behavior, but overall I'd have to say I had a good time watching it. Randomly...Bowie's "Heroes" may have been an obvious choice, but so what? It's what they wanted to hear, I think. There were few technical problems besides poor Melissa Etheridge's inoperable mic and un-tuned guitar. I enjoyed the film vignettes that were interspersed throughout the performances, especially those from Ed Burns and Woody Allen. While I'm not a fan of The Who, they blew just about every other performer out of the water that night. One particular favorite moment of mine: Elton John and Billy Joel dueting on John's "Your Song" (my favorite EJ song). Elton was looking more queenly than Elizabeth and had me chuckling when he said he loved "a man in uniform." Worst moment of the evening: the booing of Hillary Clinton. Just plain bad behavior. And coming in a close second for worst moment was the performance of Paul McCartney's new song, "Freedom", written right after the the attacks. I don't think I was misguided in expecting something a bit less pedestrian and childlike from one of the most reknowned pop songwriters of the past century. A final favorite moment: the appearance onstage of Natalie Portman and a firefighter. On that night the cops, firefighters and emergency services workers were as much celebrities as the celebrities, and the adorbale Miss Portman could have been standing next to her favorite pop star for all of her excitement. I think she spoke for all of us when after kissing and hugging the fireman next to her she said to the crowd, in all sincerity, "I'd kiss you all if I could. Thank you."

Now, if you want to read about a wholly different benefit that took place this past weekend, you need to read this Salon article by Eric Lipton. I don't think I've read anything so funny or pathetic in my life. Well, I probably have. But this article is way up there. Please read it!

"The pin — a guardian angel wearing a fireman's helmet — was a gift from New York City Deputy Fire Chief Ray Downey to his wife Rosalie, a present for their 40th wedding anniversary last April. "

Invisibles!

This week's quiz is up. My score was so poor, it's not worth mentioning. Speaking of score, here are the answers to last week's Invisibles. The two I didn't know were from the recent Mars flicks, "Red Planet" and "Mission to Mars".

Try this one - Actor Additions - figure out the actor's name from the visual rebuses. I got 'em all!

"NASA Wants Volunteers to Go to Bed for a Month."

And I just wasted postage on today's batch of resumes.

"A message to Ariel Sharon and Yasir Arafat: Knock it off, right now."

I am Data. Crap.

A friend indeed.

OK, this is embarrassing. Quite a few years ago, say when I was around 30, a bunch of us spent a week at our cabin in Maine - me, my sisters, brother, a cousin and a friend. We were sitting around playing cards one night and after a few hours and quite a lot of beer, the conversation turned to the show, "Friends". Since there were six of us, it became necessary to decide which friend best described each person present. For reasons I still don't understand, it was determined that I "was" Chandler. Chandler! A guy! Hmph.

Well, the burden of being the Chandler of the group has at last been lifted. According to Emode, my inner friend is Rachel:

She's everybody's sweetheart, despite some (mostly) endearing quirks. And it looks like you too, have a little Rachel Green inside you. (If you're lucky, you might share her good looks too). Some may see you as a little spoiled, or at times naive. But overall you're a total doll. Like the real Rachel, you make your way in the world, figuring it out as you go.

Sometimes your story-book ideals of how things should turn out keep you from taking life as it comes, but that lovable vulnerability just makes people feel closer to you. You have true compassion, an idiosyncratic side your friends delight in—and, of course, great taste. Reminder, o charming one: People love it when you call them "hun."

Now excuse me while I go find out what my theme song is.

"A night that is designed to unleash a kind of controlled anarchy comes this year at a time of national neurosis. Is it possible to reconcile the two?"

Freedom Endures.

The house that Monterey Jack built?

Enquirer declares "world exclusive" on self.

Sigh.

Another day in the Land of the Unemployed. Where boredom and apathy lurk 'round every corner. As a diversionary tactic, I am heading out to run some errands; I'm tired of sitting around here, waiting for the phone to ring. It's only been four days since my last batch of resumes went out, but it seems like forever. If I haven't heard from them by now, I probably won't hear from that all.

On that happy note, I leave you. Have a good day - I hope to post some stuff later today.

Back in Business.

Apologies for the downtime, folks. I submitted a slew of posts yesterday only to discover that none of them FTP'd successfully. Apparently, my password was not being accepted by the FTP server. After contacting technical support earlier today via e-mail and telephone my password is now acceptable. Why? Couldn't tell ya. I never spoke to a tech support agent nor did I receive a reply to my e-mail. I did get results, and I suppose that's all that really matters.

Contacted tech support and I can FTP now from home. Let's see if I can blog...

I'm having publishing trouble again. Testing...

The Random Title and Name Generator.

I shall henceforth be addressed as Acting Queen of Silly Boys and Their Bad Musical Taste, Jedi Master Regina M Dardis III. So there.

[link courtesy silly cow]

Well-said, Elise.

Social Worker Goes on Trial for Raping the Father of Her Children. What a headline. And what a betrayal of trust.

Incensed fellow panelist Christopher Hitchens, a columnist for Vanity Fair and The Nation, responded, "Excuse me? Revolt? It was state-sponsored mass murder, using civilians as missiles." Later, Hitchens said, "To say that this attack in any way resembles the French Revolution means you are a moral idiot, as well as an intellectual idiot. The man has completely lost it."

The proverbial monkey on his back.

"The bottom line is we all need to take a breath and realize that there does not have to be a single illness from this point forward if we handle these situations calmly," said Dr. Michael T. Osterholm, director of the Center for Infectious Disease Research and Policy at the University of Minnesota.

Phew.

Just made it - 6 out of 8. One I had no idea (space suits with the green background) and I just took a wild guess at another. Click here for the answers to last week's Invisibles. I don't feel so bad about my pathetic score of 3 after looking at the answers - I've never seen 3 of the movies so I actually got a 3 out of 5. Right? I should have known "True Romance", though. Great movie.

Speaking of sci-fi movies, I had my very own Star Wars marathon on Sunday night, which included only the original trilogy. Good fun, as always. Sheila noticed something that I had never in all my viewings picked up before: at the end of "Star Wars", when Luke is about to drop the bomb that'll destroy the Death Star and there's a quick cut to Darth Vader in his sporty little fighter, when he says "I have you now," or something like that...anyone ever notice that you can see the eyes of the guy under the Vader mask? It was tres spooky, for some odd reason.

Ooo! Sci-Fidelity!

Invisibles #45 - Sci-Fidelity is up. I will be very ashamed if I don't get at least a 6 out of 8. Be right back...

Another way to help.

I received this in an e-mail from a friend:

Some people in New York and DC will be having to hit foodbanks hard this winter in addition to the thousands who already need help across the country . Below is an easy way to help....

Campbell's is donating a can of soup to area foodbanks just by clicking on a football helmet at their website. Now, I know there are some pretty diehard football fans out there. Let's see which team gets the most support and help some hungry people, too! It's quick, easy, and can be done once a day . Click here:

Click for Cans

then click on your favorite team's helmet and Campbell's will donate a
can of soup . That is it ! Please pass this to a friend or 2,3,4...

Total cans donated so far: 3,591,489! That's a lot of soup.

Peter, Peter...

World Class Giant Pumpkin Home Page. Come on, I know you're dying to know...

What's In Name?

These are probably old hat, but they're new to me so I'm going to link up to 'em.

Any fans of the HBO prison drama "Oz" out there? Well, you don't have to be a fan to get your very own Oz Prison Bitch Name. Mine? Wish Bone. Ouch. (site contains adult language, so watch it)

I've been toying lately with a change in career, so this particular name generator has been quite helpful. Christie Kramz, huh? My my.

And just for shits and giggles....the White Lesbian Name Generator. (as opposed to the Black Lesbian Name Generator??).

Invisibles!

Filmwise has this week's Invisibles quiz up - #44. God, only 3 correct out of 8. You can find the answers and top scores to last week's quiz here.

Some other Filmwise quizzes:

Stars and Stripes Forever - 9 out of 12.
Splish Splash - 6 out of 12.
Copter, My Copter - 4 out of 12 - yikes!

The Evil Bert poster.

Bio-Terror

We now have confirmation that a case of anthrax has been confirmed in New York City. There is so much information swirling around out there that I don't know what to believe or even what I should be feeling. Should I be terrified? Should I be non-chalant? Or should I walk around in a fog of vaguely-defined anxiety, which is what I've been doing? I think the best way to confront issues like these is to learn as much as I can about them. Here are some pertinent articles regarding the cases of anthrax in Florida and New York:

What is anthrax?
Commentary: Anthrax in Perspective.
CDC - Public Health Emergency Preparedness and Response. [.pdf files]


In related news:

The FBI has issued an advisory regarding suspicious letters or packages. It is a .pdf file, so you will need to have Adobe Acrobat Reader installed in order to view it. If you can, I would recommend printing it out and posting it in your workplace.

During his speech and press conference last night, President Bush made reference to a warning from the FBI regarding possible imminent terrorist attacks. Here is the press release from the FBI website:

"Certain information, while not specific as to target, gives the government reason to believe that there may be additional terrorist attacks within the United States and against U.S. interests overseas over the next several days. The FBI has again alerted all local law enforcement to be on the highest alert and we call on all people to immediately notify the FBI and local law enforcement of any unusual or suspicious activity. "

Here I am again.

No time to post right now. Lots has happened since I left and it's going to take me a bit to process it all. I'll be back probably a bit later today.

Have a good afternoon!

Off I go again.

Well, you certainly can't accuse me of not taking advantage of my "time off". I'll be heading up to Massachusetts today to visit with friends Krys and Holly, then swinging by my sister Mary's in Rhode Island on the way home on Tuesday. I'm not sure yet, but I'll probably stay the night there and come home on Wednesday.

Have a good weekend, everyone!

A Find in the Ruins.

Picture 1.

Picture 2.

My God. How much misery can these people take?

"Over two decades, U2's leader has evolved from heart-on-his-sleeve idealist to irony-drenched rock 'n' roll Liberace to hopeful pragmatist."

As it happened...

"The web has no memory - unless it is created. This collection of screen shots from over 140 news sites (as of october 4th) around the world was taken on Sep 11 and 12."

[link via textism]

To boldly go where man has gone a few times before...


image courtesy trekweb.com

I'm not a die-hard Star Trek fan, but I do consider myself a fan of the entire franchise. I starting watching the original Star Trek series in reruns in the early '70s with my father as a little girl. Of the subsequent series, "Star Trek: The Next Generation" was the only one I really got into. Don't ask me to name episode titles or secondary characters or to debate the merits of the various technologies; I did however love the stories and the characters, and I believe I have seen all ST:TNG episodes.

Now we have a new series, "Enterprise", which debuted 2 weeks ago and had its first new episode of the regular season last night. I have to say I quite like it. The show takes place 150 years from now with the first mission of a deep-space, warp-capable ship (the first Enterprise, NX-01). The cast is well-chosen, I think, and although it's less gritty and psychologically whacked as my favorite sci-fi show, "Farscape" (Sci-Fi Channel, Fridays, 9:00 PM EST), it is so far less antiseptic than the other Star Trek spin-offs. The ship is much less high-tech, its interior reminiscent of current-day naval vessels, all metal and hollow-sounding. The panels on the warp drive even have those funky swirling panel lights we used to see all the time in the original series. Maybe because the humans in "Enterprise" are supposed to be less evolved than in previous STs, they seem much more like us, much more fallible and accessible. The crew is centered around a triumvirate similar to that of the original series - the Captain (Archer), a Vulcan science officer (T'Pol) and a laid-back southern chief engineer (Tucker). The chemistry between these three is good, and I hope their weekly dinner scenes continue.

If you get a chance, check it out. "Enterprise" airs on UPN on Wendesdays at 8:00 PM EST.

Chubby Chucklehead.

What an ego-twist.

Otherworldly and devastating.

Salon.com Will Charge

NYTimes item regarding Salon's move to charge readers.

Letter from Salon's editor, David Talbot.

I have no qualms with the decision to start charging Salon readers - I'm willing to pay for their quality coverage. I just don't have the money right now. Shoot.

Invisibles!

And finally for today, or at least for the next few hours, Filmwise has put up Invisibles #43. You can find the solutions to last week's quiz here.

Laughter is the Best Medicine, Right?



If you have not reached the point where you can laugh at circumstances surrounding the events of the past few weeks, then do not go to The Onion. The folks there have published what amounts to what is probably one of their finest issues. Maybe I'm just so tired of being so sad, serious and politically correct that I found myself laughing out loud. Or maybe it's just funny. If you feel ready, go read the front page. If you're not ready, don't worry - there are always archives.

Some good stuff from this issue:

President Urges Calm, Restraint Among Nation's Ballad Singers

WASHINGTON, DC— In the wake of the recent national tragedy, President Bush is urging Mariah Carey, Michael Jackson, and other singers to resist the urge to record mawkish, insipid all-star tribute ballads. "To America's recording artists, I just want to say, please, there has already been enough suffering," Bush said. "The last thing we need right now is a soaring Barbra Streisand-Brian McKnight duet titled 'One For All.'" Reports that the FBI had confiscated several notebooks and audio tapes from Diane Warren's home could not be confirmed as of press time.

:::



:::

Best Headline Ever: Jerry Falwell: Is That Guy A Dick Or What?

:::

"I don't care how holy somebody claims to be," God said. "If a person tells you it's My will that they kill someone, they're wrong. Got it? I don't care what religion you are, or who you think your enemy is, here it is one more time: No killing, in My name or anyone else's, ever again."

"Even as the White House preaches tolerance toward Muslims and Sikhs, it is practicing intolerance, signaling that anyone who challenges the leaders of an embattled America is cynical, political and — isn't this the subtext? — unpatriotic. "

NYTimes - Maureen Dowd's Op-Ed Column

"It's only fair to him to put the blame on all of us, including myself. The worst offenders are the networks because they are really a crucial part of the circulatory system of democracy. There was a time in the '60s and the '70s when the networks' reporters were an extension of the very media of which I was a part: the New York Times, the Washington Post, the L.A. Times and the Wall Street Journal. That's changed radically. With the exception of "Nightline," they've gotten out of the serious news business. In the last 10 years, the people who have been rewarded with the highest salaries have been awarded for doing the most trivial work: the male and female divas, the people who are so good at artificial empathy. And when you start doing celebrity and scandal and sex, not only is it bad of itself, it affects the larger populace."

Salon interview with David Halberstam - Why America Napped.

You Call Yourself a Pimp? Then Get Your Pimp Gear Here!

[link via textism]

*GAG*

I don't think Juan will ever be the same again. Come to think of it, I may never be the same again. How does something like that happen?? Wasn't there someone walking around missing something?

Homo Answerus

I can't believe the crap I had in my office. While cleaning out my desk on Saturday, I found an article that I had ripped out of a magazine years ago. It's from the September 1991 issue of Details magazine, a riot of a column by Jane Campbell entitled, "Male Answer Syndrome". Since I have a lot of free time on my hands, I've transcribed it for you. This is for you, girlfriend:

Why do men talk about things they know absolutely nothing about? Because they can...

In the animal kingdom males tend to exhibit what is known as "display behavior" in order to attract females and to ward off rival members. They thrust out their chests, ruffle their plumage, and generally try to appear more impressive than they really are. On nature shows, this is comic; it appears comic, too, when it shows up in its more obvious forms among humans: the guy in the Camaro with all the gold chains, say, or Vanilla Ice's haircut. Lately, however, it has been discovered that display behavior is much more common among humans than had been previously believed.

Have you ever wondered why:

Men who have never been west of Kentucky can tell you about the mentality of the Japanese?

Men who can't pay their credit card bills have a plan for dealing with the national debt?

Men who aren't on speaking terms with their families know how to acheive peace in the Middle East? [ed. note - apparently they don't]

Men who flunked high school physics can explain what went wrong at NASA?

Men who haven't had a date in six months know what women really want?

Try an experiment: Ask my friend Jeff, who spends his weekends fixing up his Harley and watching female mud wrestling, how he thinks political autonomy will affect the economies of the Baltic states.

His brow will furrow; he will purse his lips thoughtfully. "It's interesting that you mention that...," he will begin, and then he will come up with something - probably nothing remotely feasible, but something.

This behavior - the chronic answering of questions regardless of actual knowledge - is known as Male Answer Syndrome. The compulsion to answer varies from person to person, but few men are happy saying "I don't know." They prefer "That's not what's important here." [ed. note - particularly popular in the "Attorney" sub-species]

They try not to get bogged down by petty considerations, such as "Do I know anything about this subject?" or "Is what I have to say interesting?" They take a broad view of questions, treating them less as requests for specific pieces of information than as invitations to expand on some theories, air a few prejudices, and tell a couple of jokes. Some men seem to regard life as a talk show on which they are the star guest. If you ask, "What is the capital of Venezuela?" they hear, "So tell us a bit about your early years, Bob."

Sometimes this expansiveness is appealing. If you ask a woman, "Why does Mary Hart wear those sweaters?" she will shrug helplessly, acknowledging that some things are simply unknowable. A man, on the other hand, will come up with a few theories (she's related to the designer? color blind?). Men have the courage and inventiveness to try to explain the inexplicable.

But Male Answer Syndrome is by no means harmless, as my friend Pauline discovered when she was eight. She had found that eating ice cream made her teeth hurt and asked her father whether Eskimos had the same problem. "No," he said. "They have rubber teeth." Pauline repeated this information in a geography lesson and found herself the laughing-stock of the class. That was how she learned that a man, even if he is your own father, would rather make up an answer that admit his ignorance.

Later in life women run into the same problem: men can speak with such conviction that women may be fooled into thinking that they actually know what they are talking about.

A woman who finds herself in the midst of an impassioned argument about glasnost may suffer from and eerie sense of displacement. Has a weird time-space warp landed her in the Kremlin? No, she's in the mailroom with Dave and Bob, who she knows for a fact read only the sports pages.

My friend Jeff (he of the Harley) is full of expertise on subjects as diverse as global warming and Elvis's current whereabouts. In reality, however, he is an expert at only one thing: making very little knowledge go a very long way. For him answering is a game, and not knowing what he is talking about just adds to the thrill.

Expressing skepticism can be highly inflammatory. Even mild-mannered Abe Lincoln types may react to "Are you sure about that?" as a vicious slur on their manhood and find themselves backing up a ludicrous assertion with spurious facts.

It is important that not all answering is symptomatic of Male Answer Syndrome. If a womas asks, "What's for dinner?" or "Where is the bathroom?" then "Spaghetti" or "To the left" is a perfectly acceptable reply. In such circumstances anyone who screams "Men! You think you know everything!" is completely out of line.

Strangely, however, many women actively encourage male answering behavior. There is in the female a correlative condition known as the Say Wha'? Complex. Women who behind closed doors expound eloquently on particle physics may be found, in male company, gaping at the news that the world is round. [ed. note - a skill I have yet to master, hence my love life] Savvy brunettes with IQs of 190 do convincing imitations of Marylin Monroe in Some Like It Hot; they giggle breathlessly and suck on a little finger if asked so taxing a question as "What do you want to drink?"

MAS tends to be mild until puberty; boys begin to speak with authority on matters of foreign policy at the same time as they start to grow facial hair. And there is a growing consensus amongh scientists as to how MAS developed: since killing woolly mammoths and attacking enemies with rocks are now frowned upon, and since shirts open to the navel are not appropriate in every social situation, men prove their masculinity by concocting elaborate theories about football.

Growing awareness of MAS has led some to call for a moratorium on all male-female conversation. This is alarmist. But care should be taken. Women must remind themselves that if a man tells them something there is a good chance that it is particularly untrue.

~Jane Campbell, Details, September 1991

On the Dole.

Well not quite yet, but soon. I officially join the ranks of the unemployed today. I suppose now I really will have no excuse if this site isn't updated every day, huh?

My final week at the Firm was strange. I was insanely busy. So busy that I didn't have the time to properly say goodbye to many people there. Then again, I wonder if there is a proper way to say goodbye after 15 years. A bunch of us went and got drunk on Friday night. I suppose that was as proper a goodbye as any. I went back into the office on Saturday for 4 or 5 hours, to clean up, pack, organize and finally have a good cry.

The new job search has stalled. I've sent out just under twenty resumes and have only heard back from four. I really only have one lead and it's an iffy one. Of course, the timing couldn't be much worse - the economy is in the toilet, companies are in a holding pattern and we're on the verge of war. It may be time to polish up those waitressing skills.