National Day of Prayer and Remembrance



President Bush has declared today to be a National Day of Prayer and Remembrance in acknowledgment of Tuesday's tragedy. If you can, please try to make your way to your nearest house of worship to participate in the observance. The President asks that we do this at lunchtime, around 12:00 Noon. The Immaculate Conception is just across the town green here, and I am hoping to be able to make it to the lunchtime mass.

From the White House website:

NOW, THEREFORE, I, GEORGE W. BUSH, President of the United States of America, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Constitution and laws of the United States, do hereby proclaim Friday, September 14, 2001, as a National Day of Prayer and Remembrance for the Victims of the Terrorist Attacks on September 11, 2001. I ask that the people of the United States and places of worship mark this National Day of Prayer and Remembrance with noontime memorial services, the ringing of bells at that hour, and evening candlelight remembrance vigils. I encourage employers to permit their workers time off during the lunch hour to attend the noontime services to pray for our land. I invite the people of the world who share our grief to join us in these solemn observances.

IN WITNESS WHEREOF, I have hereunto set my hand this thirteenth day of September, in the year of our Lord two thousand one, and of the Independence of the United States of America the two hundred and twenty-sixth.

GEORGE W. BUSH

Reeling

I wasn't up to posting today, for obvious reasons. I will hopefully be able to resume that task tomorrow.

Take care, and God bless.

BTW, my regular nonsensical posts will resume tomorrow. In the meantime, you might want to check salon.com's coverage.

I hope you're all hangin' in there.

CNN's coverage of the latest developments.

Yahoo! images relating to yesterday's terrorism.

The Day After

I am slowly emerging from the shock of yesterday and now the tears are starting to come as I read the stories of those at ground zero. For those who would like to provide assistance to the American Red Cross Disaster Relief Fund, you can do so through the following links:

Via Amazon.com
Via PayPal

I also thought I'd point you in the direction of some of this morning's news items:

Salon.com: Flying with Phantoms
NYTimes: The Response
NYTimes Editorial: An Unfathomable Attack
NPR's All Things Considered: Entire Program for September 11, 2001
ABCNews: How to Help.

The American psyche has been irreparably damaged by this attack, and I believe this marks a defining moment for my generation. I want to say more, but I'm running out of words.

Initial Aftermath

I stopped at a Wal Mart on the way home from work today. As I pushed my cart through the aisles, I witnessed something that I could only assume was a result of today's tragic events. There were parents with children everywhere, and instead of scolding their misbehaving children, mothers and fathers were caressing their heads, holding their hands and kissing their cheeks. We have had the rug of security ripped out from under us and in our shock we must embrace those close to us as we try to regain our footing.

World Trade Center Images

Here is a link to some truly amazing images of the devastation wrought on the World Trade Center towers in New York City, including some images of the buildings collapsing. (just click on the filename)

These are really the only images I have seen of the destruction, since I have been at work all day. I sit here in my office with my ear pressed to NPR, listening as events unfold. As heart-rending as today's events have been, things can only get worse as rescue workers begin to retrieve the victims and the death toll begins to climb. I say a prayer for all of those who were lost and the families who lost them.

I have not been able to concentrate today. My heart is buried under a heavy weight of sadness and it feels almost difficult to breathe. I have all of the same unanswered questions as you - how could something like this happen? how is one supposed to react to such a potentially devastating loss of life? We are all affected by this; whoever carried out these despicable acts has perpetrated what basically amounts to an act of war against the United States. My twisted gut wants retribution, swift and brutal.

Red Cross Appeal

The Red Cross has issued an appeal for much-needed blood donors in the wake of today's shocking events. You can contact the American Red Cross at 1.800.448.3543 for more information.

Under Attack

This morning's terrorist attacks have sent me reeling. I need something to hold on to.

Many of the NYC casualties are being sent to hospitals here in Connecticut. A co-worker's sister is a nurse here in town, and she was told that the situation may require her to be at the hospital for a couple of days. The number of casualties has been estimated in the thousands.

Reports are still sketchy, but from what I've heard there is at least one more hijacked plane still in the air at this time.

I hope that you and all of your loved ones are safe. God bless.

everybody! everybody!

Run to Homestar Runner right now. I'm not sure what it's about and I can't explain it, but this flash site is LOL funny. All I've done so far is drag my mouse over the homepage icons and the hover animation is killing me. 'Toons! Hint: click down into 'toons or characters and then click "back" to return to the homepage. The animation will be different.

This site embodies the term "timewaster". What a hoot.

Once upon a time, there were three beautiful girls...

The mystery surrounding the fate of Mulder on The X-Files has been solved. He will exist only off-camera and his presence on the series will be ongoing but will consist only of pre-recorded audio that will be played back over a speaker-phone during conference calls with these three characters. They work for Mulder - Hi, Mulder!

Sort of looks like the lovechild of Margaret Thatcher and Martina Navratilova, huh?

(I do like his new song, though).

What is it with California and spree killers lately?? It really confounds me - first Soltys, then the security guard this weekend (both in Sacramento), and now this. And then there's the guy out in Iowa who killed his girlfriend, her kids and at least one other person. Since when has killing everyone you know become a solution?

I wonder if this poor man ever got his fried chicken?

Reblogger

My comments script, Reblogger, and its host were indeed undergoing some server pangs. But all seems to be well now - Jesse has moved to a new host and the script is smokin'. Thanks, Jesse!

Another Pointless Personality Test

What kind of shoes are you? My result:

Warm Fuzzy Slipper

Start squeezing the fresh OJ and fetch the paper from the porch. You're as cozy as a Warm Fuzzy Slipper. That's right. Given the choice, you'd take hanging at home with a friend over hitting a rave party any night. But that doesn't mean you're complacent. It's just that you might have gotten the crazy partier out of your system and are more content to be home, shopping from catalogs and being comfortable with who you are. Homespun gatherings are more your style—unless, of course, the annual art fair lures you out to mingle with friends in the neighborhood.

Not very sexy, but pretty much on target.

How about another? What's your movie mood? According to Emode, I'm in the mood for a

Suspense movie

Your edgy mood is setting you up for a Suspense movie. Get ready to prime that adrenaline pump with the unbearable tension and uneasy mystery that only a trip to life's seedy underworld can offer. Spies and double-crossings are standard fare. But you need to ask yourself, what's your taste in villains? There's the otherworldly evil of What Lies Beneath or The Sixth Sense. But if you prefer more earthbound bad guys, try thrillers like Psycho or Silence of the Lambs. For a sure thing, you can always count on Hitchcock for a nail-biting flick. Best of all, if you've got someone special nearby, suspense makes for a great date movie: held in each other's arms, you can wonder if everything will work out ok on that silver screen. Now, dim the lights and get ready for a great evening's entertainment.

2 for 2, I'd say. Suspense flicks are pretty much my favorite kind of movie, or at least the kind of movie I'm usually in the mood for.

What were your results?

Where the hell is this girl's mother??

I think I'm done playing with the layout for now. My comments script isn't loading, but I'm going to assume for now that's because her server is unavailable. How does it look on your end? Any errors?

Now I need to trickle the changes down to the other pages and the rest of the site. I'll get right on that, yeah...

Windows XP

The October 25 release of Microsoft's Windows XP is fast approaching, and you may be wondering what the fuss is about and if this is a move you want to make. This c|net article breaks it down pretty well and will hopefully answer some of the questions you may have.

"Losing your job may not be the end of the world, but getting laid off can have the same psychological impact on you as losing someone close to you. Many employment consultants say those who have lost their jobs experience stages of grieving similar to the ones people go through after a loved one has died."

The job hunt is churning along. I had a telephone interview yesterday that I think went pretty well. The ball's been left in my court - I'm going to take the weekend to think about whether or not I want to pursue this opportunity. I'm just so bad at making decisions. Other than, I have no really solid leads. I sent my resume out to five different people today - 2 came back saying that the position was no longer available. Damn. But the search continues...

Hello, piglet!

Still tinkering with this page.

Site Updates

Well, sort of...I added links and graphics to this page. Hope you like it.

More to come!

Bastards.

Be careful of the crown jewels, Charles!

Filmwise gets EW Nod



The Boyz at Filmwise are beaming with pride - they have been featured in this week's double-issue of Entertainment Weekly, page 167:

"This clever site, founded by two college buddies, will challenge anyone who claims to be a cinema master. Here's the setup: Actors are digitally erased from a movie scene, leaving only their hollowed-out clothes. Your mission: name the film. While there are some gimmes (what other film but The Mask has a character in a yellow zoot suit?), you'll be surprised at how few movies you can name without seeing the stars...Grade: A"

Well done, guys!

I hope you're all finished with yesterday's visual quizzes because Invisibles #39: The Underwear Edition is out. And I deserve a wicked wedgie for my score - 3 out of 8. The answers to last week's quiz, #38, are here.

Oh..oh...oh GOD.

God, that previous post just cleared away some cobwebs...I am embarrassed to recall an evening in college when my friend Sue and I scraped together what was left of our meager work-study pay and got ourselves tickets to go see Huey Lewis & The News at a club in downtown New Haven. Neither of us had a car, so we walked a couple of miles into town. Those were the days, huh? Anyway, this took place some time in 1983 (maybe '84?) - I Want a New Drug and Heart of Rock and Roll were already big hits and I just thought he was the cutest thing. Since they were playing in a club, we were able to get up right next to the stage. There he was, sweating in his tight black shirt, tight black pants and skinny belt, right in front of me. I was young and didn't know better and yes, I screamed out to Huey to "Take it off!!"

Sorry, Russell. I'm older and wiser now and would never insult your band or your musical prowess (did somebody say prowess?) by saying such a thing and thereby reducing you to a mere sex object. While we're talking, I was wondering...that skirt you wore in Gladiator wouldn't happen to be a part of your stage wardrobe, would it?

"This is a band. It's not Chippendales. Get the f*ck out of here."

-- Russell Crowe, deflecting female fans' demands that he take off his shirt as his band, Thirty Odd Foot of Grunts, made its New York debut last week.

My appreciation for remarks like these is just another indicator of my bad taste in men.

[source: salon's Nothing Personal]

The Mathematical Brain

"In particular, Butterworth contrasts the virtuous circle of encouragement, enjoyment, understanding, and good performance leading to more encouragement with the vicious circle of discouragement, anxiety, avoidance, and poor performance leading to more discouragement."

Jesus Christ. When will it ever stop?

Quiz Time!

Here's a timewaster for you. Filmwise has a bunch of Visual quizzes that have been piling up on me since my last visit to that section. Try 'em for yourself and let me know how you do:

Cutout #2 - 7 out of 8!
Send in the Clowns - 6 out of 12 - I hate clowns.
Comp Time - 5 out of 12 - Ouch!
Holy Cow - 5 out of 12 - not up on my moo-vie cows, apparently.
Damaged Goods - 8 outta 8! - she finishes big!

Random Chicken. Just because.

[link courtesy swallowingtacks.com]

Blah Blah Blah

I've been neglecting you all. To be honest, I've been just plain neglectful of everything this weekend. My health, my apartment, my social life. My health because instead of getting outside to enjoy this beautiful holiday weekend by engaging in actual physical activity, I've spent my days lounging around the house, watching video rentals, devouring everything in sight and napping when I can. That's because my nights have either been spent drinking and smoking too much or staying up until 3 in the morning just for the hell of it. I am living in virtual squalor (well, not really, but the place could use a good sweep and vacuum), but I can't quite muster up the energy to clean it. And my social life took a couple of hits this weekend - just flesh wounds (picnics at friends' yesterday and today) that shouldn't leave a mark, but still. I get like this every once in a while. I do not multi-task well, and when life starts piling up on me, I need to shut down for a little while. So I needed this weekend. I was a lazy, disgusting, negligent slob, and it was great.

So now I'm psyching myself up for the weeks ahead. On Friday I applied online to a few jobs and sent 4 resumes out. I'll pick up the search again tomorrow and hopefully be able to send a few more out. The interview process is what scares me the most. I haven't been on a job interview in over 15 years. Despite all of the evidence to the contrary, I don't like to talk about myself, to really talk about myself. And what the heck am I going to wear? I have a closet full of work clothes, but I've always dressed pretty casually at work. Maybe I could pick up a black suit jacket that I could use to dress things up a bit. Or I could raid my sister's closet. Just kidding, Sheila.

Okay, now I'm just rambling.

The resume is done! Now I have to find someone to send it to.

Thank God for small favors, I suppose.

Arrghh!!

I H A T E writing a resume. Time for a lunchbreak.

Never Steal An Action Hero's Truck

FARWELL, Texas — Jarrod Franse didn't run for help when he saw two men stealing his pickup truck; he jumped in.

The 23-year-old college student had just returned to his home after a round of golf when he saw two men next two his 1991 Dodge Durango. They jumped in and started the engine when he approached, but the Farwell resident wasn't ready to say farewell to his truck just yet.

"His reaction was just to jump in the back," said Parmer County Sheriff Randy Geries, who was quick to add that he didn't recommend the risky stunt.

The two thieves then raced off onto a local highway, reaching speeds of more than 100 mph, Geries said.

"They're swerving slamming on the breaks, trying to throw this guy out," Geries said. Franse held on and shouted to other drivers for help. Eventually he broke the window into the passenger cab and started wrestling with the men.

After almost an hour, the thieves had enough, Geries said. They pulled over and ran off on foot, abandoning Franse and his truck. After he drove to a nearby farmhouse to call for help, police arrived and hunted for the hapless car thieves in the thick rows of corn.

"It belonged to this young man and he wasn't about to let it go," Geries remarked. With the help of a K-9 unit, they apprehended Joe Angel Roldan, 18, but the other suspect — a juvenile — managed to hide in the field overnight. He turned himself in the following morning, covered with more than 300 mosquito bites, police said.

They were charged with aggravated kidnapping and unauthorized use of a motor vehicle.

[source abcnews.com crimeblotter]

Some clarification on the Seattle jumper story

Jill, a friend of mine who lives and works in Seattle, was kind enough to send along a clarification of the Yahoo story:

Now, the Yahoo! story isn't quite right--the jumper didn't jump because commuters were yelling at her to do so simply because there weren't any cars going by her at the time. Starting at about 7:00 this morning, she had been sitting on the bridge railing on the Southbound side of I-5. So they closed the southbound lanes as police tried to talk her down. But northbound lanes slowed to take a look at it was northbound commuters that were yelling at her to jump. So they closed the Northbound lanes, too. At the time she jumped, there were no cars on I-5. But still, as I said before, it's disgusting.

I agree. You can read the local news story here.

The phrase, "You hit the nail on the head" comes to mind...

Frustrated Seattle commuters remove the cause of a traffic jam.

I've started to take down and put away those things that identify this office as mine. As I was cleaning off the corkboard, I found these two images. The one on the left was taken from the front porch of our cabin in Maine. The other was taken from the same shore, just a little further out towards the point, at sunset, while walking back for dinner.

IE 6.0 is out. Make sure you read the fine print.

Men, Avert Your Eyes

Sweet Jesus.

What a Loser

So, here I am, all set with my vacation plans, got the time off, etc., and can you believe I can't find a single soul to go away with me?? Oh, how sad!

Well, consider this an open call for a vacation companion - anyone interested in spending a week in a cabin way up on the coast of Maine from 9/15 through 9/22? ;)

According to Humans For Sale, I am worth about $1,423,040.00. I don't make it into the 50 most expensive females, and I am actually below the average cost of a female, but I was thinking...I will be without a job in about a month, and $1.4 million is an awful lot of money...

[link courtesy confessionalism]

Ooo, I love this song...

...that's when Billy Joe McAllister jumped o-o-ff the Tallahachee Bri-i-dge...

Remember that curse I told you about? The one where those Greek monks put the whammy on an entire village, dooming them all to a century of sleepless nights? Well, looks like the monks have finally relented.

"Presenting his findings here Sunday at the annual meeting of the American Chemical Society, Antonucci explained that, in lab studies using enamel from cow's teeth, ACP effectively reversed the erosive process that causes cavities. The compound does this by releasing calcium and phosphate ions that ``in the right proportions, can form the natural mineral that is found in teeth and bones,'' Antonucci explained."

Do Over!!

I just checked the answers to last week's Invisibles and I see that my score was actually 7 out of 8, not 6 out of 8. I typed in "Something About Mary" instead of "There's Something About Mary." Picky picky ;).

Head over and check out Invisibles #38 before the boys get too big for their britches - it seems Entertainment Weekly will be featuring them in their upcoming double-issue. Keep your eye peeled.

Oh, how gruesome.

And what be your name, swabbo?

I know you've all been dying to know what your pirate name is; this Pirate Name Generator will finally put your mind at ease.

Captain Anne Bonney, signing off. Arrrr!

[link courtesy usr/bin/girl]

"He'd been calling himself Michael Scott for a while, but since that name was already taken on the British actors' trade union's list he had to come up with a new name. And quick too, he was standing in a phone booth in Leicester Square with his agent waiting on the line! Years later, in an interview by Barry Norman, he recalled the moment: "I just looked through the trees, at the Odeon Leicester Square [Cinema], it just said Caine Mutiny. So, I just said Caine. If I'd gone to the Leicester Square Theatre, I'd have been called Michael A Hundred and One Dalmatians!"

Excellent fan site.

A supermarket chain is considering renaming one of the nation's favourite puddings to save men from blushing when they buy it.

They've just thought of this now?

Connecticore

If you had asked me yesterday if Connecticut had a music scene, I would have replied, "If you consider the Jazz Festival in snooty Litchfield a music scene, then yes, I suppose we do." Imagine my surprise, then, when I read this New York Times article. Could good old Meriden, until now known mostly for its mall, actually give Seattle or Minneapolis a run for their respective money? I doubt it, but kinda cool just the same.

Headline of the day:

"Smiley the Clown Found Guilty of Sodomy."

Site Changes

Sorry for all of the recent changes, but I haven't really been all that happy with the design of this page lately. I think I've got it where I want it (practically back the way it used to be). Now I just have to work on content!

I just love this picture.

Six Feet Under


image courtesy hbo.com

I'm hooked on another show - HBO's Six Feet Under. I missed portions of the earlier episodes, but once the series hit its mid-season (around episode 6), I was hooked. I especially love the way the characters' true selves have been slowly revealed to us over 13 episodes, as opposed to shoved down our throats immediately. I am so glad I gave this show a chance. As messed up as the Fischers, et al are, I have so much invested in them now that any failure they may experience will be devastating to me, as a viewer. Moriarty, from Ain't It Cool News, has written a full-season review. I disagree with him on some points, but overall I think he expresses himself very well, and he is of an opinion similar to mine.

[if you haven't watched any of the shows and don't want to know anything about them, then I would skip the review]

Terry Do? More like Terry, Don't!!

The way life should be.

Since I'm staying at my job until Sept 30, I still have 5 vacation days coming to me (a week). I could be a responsible adult and save them and receive the pay upon my departure, but I won't. I'm going to take the week and head up to our cabin on the coast of Maine. I will surely need to get away, and I don't expect to get any more paid vacation time until at least a year from now. So why not take advantage of it while I can, right? Besides, I need a pleasant diversion in the midst of all this uncertainty.



More than you ever wanted to know about Maine:

Capital: Augusta
Population: Approximately 1.2 million
Gemstone: Tourmaline
Fossil: Pertica quadrifaria
Cat: Maine Coon Cat
Insect: Honeybee
Animal: Moose
Flag: The coat of arms of the State of Maine is placed on a blue field of the same shade of blue in the flag of the United States. Adopted by the Legislature of 1909.
Motto: Dirigo (I lead)
Tree: White Pine, adopted by the Legislature of 1945.
Floral Emblem: White pine cone and tassel (Pinus strobus, linnaeus). Adopted by the Legislature of 1895.
Bird: Chickadee (Parus atricapillus) Adopted by the Legislature of 1927.
Fish: Landlocked Salmon

What a catch, huh?

When pigs fly, you say?

Now why didn't Mulder think of this...

Larry Bryant, 62, filed the suit in state court here on June 5, the day before the anniversary of the Allies' D-Day invasion during World War II. Bryant filed on behalf of all people of the planet Earth and also Citizens Against UFO Secrecy (CAUS), a sky-watching group based in Scottsdale, Ariz.

I'm playing with CSS now (cascading style sheets), so bear with me if things go wonky on you.

Considering my immediate need for comic relief, I thought it would be fitting to re-visit The Secret Diary of Alan Greenspan. Some of you may remember me mentioning this site previously - if not, get thee over there!

And while you're at it, take a look at another Nabobs offering - Martha Stewart's Erotic Journal. 'Nuff said.

[the above contains adult material - you've been warned so don't blame me if you become a wanton hussy]

Run, piggies, run!

Oh, pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease...

Your eyes are not playing tricks on you - I'm playing with the layout and design.

It's funny sometimes how life will sneak up on you, tap you on the shoulder politely and knock you on your unsuspecting ass before you even get a chance to see what's coming.

Actually, I suppose on some level I did see this coming. Denial is a strong suit of mine. I was informed yesterday morning, upon return from my vacation, that due to re-organization of the Firm, my position will be eliminated effective October 1, 2001. Simple as that.

Anyone need a 37-year-old who wants to work in computers, but who knows a little bit about a lot of things but not a lot about any one thing? Time to go back to school, methinks. God, this sucks. But it's also an opportunity, right? An opportunity to finally get out there and do something different, exciting...scary.

Another funny thing about life...without your knowledge it lays down safety nets for you, giving seemingly innocuous events a greater meaning, or altering the significance of others. My mother moved in with me a couple of weeks ago; when I first heard the news yesterday, this was a burden. This could not have happened at a worse time, now that we're supporting her as well as ourselves. But then this morning, as she kissed and hugged me goodbye, told me she loved me and that everything was going to be okay, I couldn't imagine what I would do if she wasn't there to prop me up.

Onward and upward, as they say.

"Invented by religion, enforced by the state, and cashed in on by the psychiatric community, guilt is what keeps society from completely unraveling. Yet our culture is rife with politically correct apologists telling us to let go of the shame that binds us, and to treat our mistakes as learning experiences that we have to "heal" from and "put behind us" as quickly as we can. Well, that's just bullshit. If you do something wrong, you should feel guilty about it. Guilt is the pruning shears that society developed to prevent you from growing into an even bigger asshole than you already are. Sorry, I feel bad that I said that."

Publishing problem fixed. My FTP server has a new IP address, apparently. News to me.

"If it feels good, do it: a rallying cry of the '60s and the root of a lot of really awful parenting. Jackson may have been admirably comfortable with his body, but like many children of hippie parents, he was in the dark about some very basic social rules, such as the one that says don't jack off in public. "

Testing, 1, 2, 3....

Blogger is poop.

Hehe, good one.

link courtesy brainsluice

I seem to be having some publishing trouble.

Man, what a day this has been. More on that later.

Well, Whadya Know

Just how does a Venus flytrap eat dinner?

A native of the Carolinas, the Venus flytrap grows in soil that lacks the nitrogen it needs. Enter the nitrogen-rich fly. And enter he does at the top of the foot-high plant where there are leaves that resemble two hinged lobes, usually open in a mouth-like array. On their surface are sensitive hairs. The fly lands on a hair, triggering the leaves to close, holding him prisoner. The plant digests the fly with fluids it secretes through the leaves.

[source: The World Book Encyclopedia]

Why does the shower curtain get sucked in toward you when you shower?

Until recently, we didn't understand the process, but now we do. David Schmidt, professor of mechanical engineering at the University of Massachusetts, took a $28,000 computer software model of spraying liquids and applied it to his mother-in-law's bathtub. Two weeks and 1.5 million calculations later, he discovered that: The water from the shower spray slowed down as it fell, the result of hitting the air. This process caused the air to become turbulent, actually forming a miniature storm system with low pressure at its center. The air pressure outside the shower, now higher than inside it, pushed the curtain in.

[source: The New York Times ]

Why do angels have halos?

Becoming an angel would be quite a feather in anyone's cap, wouldn't it? Well, that's something like what the artists who originally depicted angels had in mind. Many of the customs and much of the iconography of our great religions were adapted from paganism. In the case of angelic halos, the source was sun worship. People who worshipped the sun emulated its rays by wearing rings of feathers on their heads. That would be too tacky for angels, so they were painted with actual rays of light.

[source: Ever Wonder Why? By Douglas B. Smith]

Makeup Quiz

While I was away, Filmwise posted two more Invisibles Quizzes...

[you can find the answers to quiz #35 here]

Invisibles #36 - I Wanna Be A Cowboy is a goodie, and since we're a week late, you get instant gratification when you submit your answers - the solutions will appear on the same page as your score.

Invisibles #37 is this week's quiz, and once again I scored 6 out of 8. Good Luck!

Back Home

I'm home! Vancouver was wonderful, as usual, and I'll be back soon with all the news that's fit to print, and hopefully I'll be able to post some pictures by the end of the week. I hope everyone had a good week!

"Paul says he plans to chop off his lower legs himself - with a DIY guillotine - live on the internet as a pay-per-view event. "

Overheard in Auckland, New Zealand... "Am I the only one who hears that constant buzzing noise?"

Invisibles!

Better late than never, right? You can find the top scores and answers to last week's quiz here. And Invisibles #35 is waiting for you...

Oh, what the hell...

How about a song?

Reporter
Hello, everyone, this is your action news reporter with all the news
that is news across the nation, on the scene at the supermarket. There
seems to have been some disturbance here. Pardon me, sir, did you see what happened?

Witness
Yeah, I did. I's standin' overe there by the tomaters, and here he
come, running through the pole beans, through the fruits and vegetables,
nekkid as a jay bird. And I hollered over t' Ethel, I said, "Don't
look, Ethel!" But it's too late, she'd already been incensed.

Chorus
Here he comes, look at that, look at that
There he goes, look at that, look at that
And he ain't wearin' no clothes

Oh, yes, they call him the Streak
Look at that, look at that
Fastest thing on two feet
Look at that, look at that
He's just as proud as he can be
Of his anatomy
He goin' give us a peek

Oh, yes, they call him the Streak
Look at that, look at that
He likes to show off his physique
Look at that, look at that
If there's an audience to be found
He'll be streakin' around
Invitin' public critique

Reporter
This is your action news reporter once again, and we're here at the gas
station. Pardon me, sir, did you see what happened?

Witness
Yeah, I did. I's just in here gettin my car checked, he just appeared
out of the traffic. Come streakin' around the grease rack there, didn't
have nothin' on but a smile. I looked in there, and Ethel was gettin'
her a cold drink. I hollered, "Don't look, Ethel!" But it was too
late. She'd already been mooned. Flashed her right there in front of
the shock absorbers.

Chorus
He ain't crude, look at that, look at that
He ain't lewd, look at that, look at that
He's just in the mood to run in the nude

Oh, yes, they call him the Streak
Look at that, look at that
He likes to turn the other cheek
Look at that, look at that
He's always makin' the news
Wearin' just his tennis shoes
Guess you could call him unique

Reporter
Once again, your action news reporter in the booth at the gym, covering
the disturbance at the basketball playoff. Pardon me, sir, did you see
what happened?

Witness
Yeah, I did. Half time, I's just goin' down thar to get Ethel a snow
cone. And here he come, right out of the cheap seats, dribbling, right
down the middle of the court. Didn't have on nothing but his head.
Made a hook shot and got out through the concessions. And I hollered up
at Ethel, I said, "Don't look, Ethel!" But it was too late. She'd
already got a free shot. Grandstandin', right there in front of the
home team.

Chorus Witness
Oh, yes, they call him the Streak Here he comes again.
Look at that, look at that Who's that with him?
The fastest thing on two feet Ethel? Is that you, Ethel?
Look at that, look at that What do you think you're
He's just as proud as he can be doin'? You git your
Of his anatomy clothes on!
He's gonna give us a peek

Oh, yes, they call him the Streak Ethel! Where you goin'?
Look at that, look at that Ethel, you shameless
He likes to show off his physique hussy! Say it isn't so,
Look at that, look at that Ethel! Ethelllllll!!!
If there's an audience to be found
He'll be streakin' around
Invitin' public critique

~ Ray Stevens, "The Streak"

Yeah, ah did.

"Presti was arrested early Wednesday after he was spotted, nude, filling up his sport utility vehicle at a service station on Route 7. "He thought it was a good thing to do, considering the weather," Sgt. Mark Blanchette said. "

Hooligans-in-Training.

New Do

I got my hair done this afternoon, and I must say, I like it! I sort of look like Rob Thomas now, which probably isn't so good since I'm a girl, but what the hell.

Miller Rant

Dennis Miller lets loose on Sex and Washington, D.C.:

"Now, I don't believe there's any danger of a sex scandal with our current administration. President Bush not only appears to be deeply in love with his wife, he thinks "fetish" is something you crumble on top of a Greek salad."

Sign outside the bank next door: 113 degrees

Now, I know that can't be right since if it was, people would be flopping around on the sidewalks like sizzling strips of bacon, but still...

Hot enough for ya??

Good L O R D! For once in my life I am rushing to get to work in the morning and taking my time leaving at the end of the day. I find myself looking for places to stop on the way home so I can sit as long as possible in air-conditioned bliss in my truck. The heat is so oppressive in my apartment in the early evening that anyone who happened to stop by would think that they had arrived at the scene of a Jonestown-like suicide pact, what with all the bodies (animal and human) strewn about the place. Things cooled off a tiny bit by the time I went to bed, where I was actually able to lay a sheet on top of me, feet exposed, of course.

I'm getting my hair done this afternoon - cut and 'chunky' highlights. I need to try to keep some perspective, though, and not let this heat lead me to something drastic, like chopping all my hair off. Wish me luck!

T-shirt spotted this morning:

It's not a beer belly --
it's the fuel tank for a love machine.

They say timing is everything...

Episode II gets a title -- Attack of the Clones. Without the creepy relevance to current events, that has to be one of the worst titles I have ever seen. Ho hum.

Whoa!! Eddie who??

Clone Wars

This is not the place, and I'm certainly not person, for a thoughful debate on the ethics of cloning. But I thought I'd make note of today's announcement by a "team of reproductive specialists" that they are about to begin human cloning of 200 test subjects. The sci-fi geek in me is intrigued by the concept, its applications and its ramifications. But I also believe in God, in the human soul, and that there are just some things that we are not meant to do. This scares the crap out of me.

Just because we can, it does not necessarily follow that we should.

Are you a 'Sex and the City' Fan?

I am, and I'm a bit peeved right now. I usually watch the encore showing of Sunday's episode on Wednesday so I didn't see it last night. Apparently there was quite the plot development and I was just thoroughly spoiled by this article's front page headline. Damn.

"Park railings are there for a reason," said Ranger Jeff Kracht, the park's search and rescue coordinator. "Is it worth risking your life and the lives of rescue personnel for a $10 baseball cap?"

I'd be pissed, too.

I'm still alive...kinda.

What a whirlwind the past week has been. I have to apologize for my disappearance. 5 days! Oops.

My mother finally moved in with us this weekend. I feel like I've been preparing for this all summer long. I guess I have. I took last Wednesday, Thursday and Friday off of work and did some preliminary packing/cleaning at her apartment, as well as lining up a storage unit and U-Haul truck. I didn't think my body could take the punishment I gave it this weekend - not only were we moving her out of a second story apartment, it was also about 95 degrees out, with off-the-scale humidity. However, despite a couple of broken fingernails, a nearly broken toe, various bruises and a body so achy that I'm walking like I've got a stick up my a**, I'm doing pretty good today.

Now it's time to look forward to next week's trip to Vancouver. If ever there was a time I needed to get away, this it it!

The Spies Who Came In From Retirement

Two Cold War spies -- one American, one Russian -- meet on a street corner in downtown Washington. They rendezvous in broad daylight, but they're headed to shadowy sides of the city.