Do you know where your President is?
Have a good day!
4.30.2006
4.28.2006
Welcome to my TV Nightmare.
Rosie O'Donnell gets new daytime "View".
Three of the most obnoxious people on television on the same set. Poor Elizabeth Hassleback, whoever she is.
Three of the most obnoxious people on television on the same set. Poor Elizabeth Hassleback, whoever she is.
4.27.2006
There're Only Five More To Go.
and
There's Only One Sydney Bristow
Sloane is brought, blindfolded, to Minsk to meet The Prophet 5 Consortium of Twelve, but I'll just call them The Twelve. Joseph leads Sloane to a door and tells him The Twelve are waiting inside for him. Sloane figures out that Joseph isn't allowed in the room. He's just an errand boy and Sloane takes the opportunity to lord it over him by handing Joseph his coat for safekeeping. The Twelve tell Sloane he needs to do one more task for them and they will give him the cure for Nadia. He needs to draw Sydney back to work. He makes them promise that Sydney will not be hurt.
Peyton visits Anna Espinosa in prison (Hi Anna!) and tells her they'll help Anna get out of prison if they help them do something. Anna'd rather kick Peyton's skinny ass. Until Peyton tells her that helping them will give her the opportunity to hurt Sydney Bristow.
Back at The Twelve's HQ, Sloane's not so sure he will be able to convince Sydney to return to work. They tell him not to worry, she will have an incentive to do so.
At Sydney's house, she's in the baby's room when she hears a loud crashing noise from another part of the house. She goes out to check and finds a flustered SpyDaddy in the kitchen picking up a bunch of knives from the floor. "I dropped these while putting them in a cupboard. Sydney, you can't leave sharp-edged weapons where a child can reach them, especially not a Bristow woman." Ha! Um, Dad, she's only 4 weeks old. Sydney asks whether there's been any new intel on her mother's location and Jack says no, and tells her that she should enjoy her maternity leave. If they need her, they'll let her know.
Well, they're gonna need her soon because Anna just came calling at Will's (Hi Will!) Witness Protection house. She pretends to be an FBI agent and tells Will that Sydney's in trouble. Will lets her in. Bad idea Will.
Sydney has to cut her maternity leave short when she finds out that Will's been kidnapped and SpyDaddy has hired some babysitters for her: two agents trained in infant care, complete with a briefcase full of baby supplies. Agent Rance hilariously tells her that they want to start off by babyproofing the house with cameras, listening devices and explosives sensors - you know, the usual stuff. By the way, her name is Isabelle and she's cute as a button.
The doctor with the pointy electrical stick from the container ship is back and this time he injects something into the base of Will's skull.
The gang at APO intercepts a communication between Anna and some Russian guy - she's going to hand over Will for some cash. In Russia somewhere. So they all head to Moscow for a classic Alias mission in a nightclub. Sydney finds Will in a room, tied to a chair, in a scene I found reminiscent of one of the best scenes this show has had, from the season 1 episode "Rendezvous".
Remember, it was when Will first found out that she was a spy? Sydney walked into a room where Will was tied to a chair, kicked the crap out of the guy guarding him and scared the hell out of Will. All while wearing a red wig. This time Sydney has to fight Anna. Anna pulls a knife and cuts her. There must have been some kind of nanobots or something on the knife that got into her blood because next we see Dr. Pointy Stick watching a computer screen as biological data is being uploaded from Sydney's body. Her mission accomplished, Anna breaks a window and escapes.
On the flight back home, Sydney and Will catch up on old times. They have such great chemistry. Will tells Syd that he is going to be married soon and Syd tells him that she has a baby girl with Vaughn and she has to lie to him and tell him that Vaughn is dead. Back at Sydney's house, Will and Syd are cooing over the baby when Agent Rance's explosives sensors go berserk and the source is somehow Will. Will is examined by an APO doctor and they discover he has a bomb in his head! They can't remove it and in order to defuse it they need to get close to the detonator. Guess who has the detonator?
Anna has called and informed them that she'll give them the detonator in exchange for Rambaldi's Page 47 (the one with the prophecy about Sydney). There's a great little throwback of a scene with Sloane conducting a review of Rambaldi in the conference room. Ah, the good old days. After hearing everything, including the prophecy about Sydney bringing "utter destruction upon the greatest power in the world", Rachel hilariously asks, "And you guys believe this stuff?" They decide it's worth giving Anna the artifact to save Will's life.
Cut to a train speeding through the Lisbon countryside. Syd and Will are undercover as a French couple. Syd meets Anna in the dining car and her watch is some kind of gizmo that links to the detonator and starts downloading the codes necessary to defuse Will's head bomb. Anna and Syd head to another car for some privacy and Syd hands over the case with Page 47. But Anna doesn't want to hand over the detonator. She starts to leave and Syd jumps her. They fight and Anna hits the detonator and Will sees a counter pop up on his computer screen - he's got about 40 seconds before his head blows up. As Sydney and Anna fight, Will freaks, holding his head and yelling, "My head is beeping!" Sydney pushes the stop button just as it reaches 2 seconds, but Anna grabs the briefcase, exits the car and closes and locks the door. She pushes a button and a red liquid chemical begins to spray from the fire sprinklers, soaking and overcoming Sydney. Somehow, this liquid is absorbing Sydney's DNA and as it's collected in a tank under the train car it is downloaded to a computer back at Dr. Pointy Stick's office.
Will is able to get in to Sydney and open the side door for some air, but Anna's back and she's picked up the detonator. She pushes the button and chucks it out the door. Will's head starts beeping again! Sydney grabs Will and they both jump out of the train car and off of a very high bridge into a river, where Sydney finds the detonator and stops it just in time. Completely off the scale impossible but I don't care - I'm just glad Will's head didn't explode.
Will and Sydney are taking Isabelle for a walk in a very nice scene where he tells her that she is not responsible for the bad things that happen to the people in her life. He tells her that he and everyone else who loves her is thankful every day because they know that's she's out there fighting the bad guys and making the world a safer place. Aw. He tells her, "There's only one Sydney Bristow."
Not so fast, Will. It seems that Prophet 5 and Dr. Pointy Stick are putting all that DNA they stole to good use by genetically altering Anna Espinosa, turning her into a Sydney Bristow clone.
Who else thinks that now we can have the Rambaldi prophecy come true and protect Sydney at the same time? Nadia will be cured and she will fight and kill Anna-as-Syd? Works for me.
There's another new episode next Wednesday at 8:00!
There's Only One Sydney Bristow
Sloane is brought, blindfolded, to Minsk to meet The Prophet 5 Consortium of Twelve, but I'll just call them The Twelve. Joseph leads Sloane to a door and tells him The Twelve are waiting inside for him. Sloane figures out that Joseph isn't allowed in the room. He's just an errand boy and Sloane takes the opportunity to lord it over him by handing Joseph his coat for safekeeping. The Twelve tell Sloane he needs to do one more task for them and they will give him the cure for Nadia. He needs to draw Sydney back to work. He makes them promise that Sydney will not be hurt.
Peyton visits Anna Espinosa in prison (Hi Anna!) and tells her they'll help Anna get out of prison if they help them do something. Anna'd rather kick Peyton's skinny ass. Until Peyton tells her that helping them will give her the opportunity to hurt Sydney Bristow.
Back at The Twelve's HQ, Sloane's not so sure he will be able to convince Sydney to return to work. They tell him not to worry, she will have an incentive to do so.
At Sydney's house, she's in the baby's room when she hears a loud crashing noise from another part of the house. She goes out to check and finds a flustered SpyDaddy in the kitchen picking up a bunch of knives from the floor. "I dropped these while putting them in a cupboard. Sydney, you can't leave sharp-edged weapons where a child can reach them, especially not a Bristow woman." Ha! Um, Dad, she's only 4 weeks old. Sydney asks whether there's been any new intel on her mother's location and Jack says no, and tells her that she should enjoy her maternity leave. If they need her, they'll let her know.
Well, they're gonna need her soon because Anna just came calling at Will's (Hi Will!) Witness Protection house. She pretends to be an FBI agent and tells Will that Sydney's in trouble. Will lets her in. Bad idea Will.
Sydney has to cut her maternity leave short when she finds out that Will's been kidnapped and SpyDaddy has hired some babysitters for her: two agents trained in infant care, complete with a briefcase full of baby supplies. Agent Rance hilariously tells her that they want to start off by babyproofing the house with cameras, listening devices and explosives sensors - you know, the usual stuff. By the way, her name is Isabelle and she's cute as a button.
The doctor with the pointy electrical stick from the container ship is back and this time he injects something into the base of Will's skull.
The gang at APO intercepts a communication between Anna and some Russian guy - she's going to hand over Will for some cash. In Russia somewhere. So they all head to Moscow for a classic Alias mission in a nightclub. Sydney finds Will in a room, tied to a chair, in a scene I found reminiscent of one of the best scenes this show has had, from the season 1 episode "Rendezvous".
Remember, it was when Will first found out that she was a spy? Sydney walked into a room where Will was tied to a chair, kicked the crap out of the guy guarding him and scared the hell out of Will. All while wearing a red wig. This time Sydney has to fight Anna. Anna pulls a knife and cuts her. There must have been some kind of nanobots or something on the knife that got into her blood because next we see Dr. Pointy Stick watching a computer screen as biological data is being uploaded from Sydney's body. Her mission accomplished, Anna breaks a window and escapes.
On the flight back home, Sydney and Will catch up on old times. They have such great chemistry. Will tells Syd that he is going to be married soon and Syd tells him that she has a baby girl with Vaughn and she has to lie to him and tell him that Vaughn is dead. Back at Sydney's house, Will and Syd are cooing over the baby when Agent Rance's explosives sensors go berserk and the source is somehow Will. Will is examined by an APO doctor and they discover he has a bomb in his head! They can't remove it and in order to defuse it they need to get close to the detonator. Guess who has the detonator?
Anna has called and informed them that she'll give them the detonator in exchange for Rambaldi's Page 47 (the one with the prophecy about Sydney). There's a great little throwback of a scene with Sloane conducting a review of Rambaldi in the conference room. Ah, the good old days. After hearing everything, including the prophecy about Sydney bringing "utter destruction upon the greatest power in the world", Rachel hilariously asks, "And you guys believe this stuff?" They decide it's worth giving Anna the artifact to save Will's life.
Cut to a train speeding through the Lisbon countryside. Syd and Will are undercover as a French couple. Syd meets Anna in the dining car and her watch is some kind of gizmo that links to the detonator and starts downloading the codes necessary to defuse Will's head bomb. Anna and Syd head to another car for some privacy and Syd hands over the case with Page 47. But Anna doesn't want to hand over the detonator. She starts to leave and Syd jumps her. They fight and Anna hits the detonator and Will sees a counter pop up on his computer screen - he's got about 40 seconds before his head blows up. As Sydney and Anna fight, Will freaks, holding his head and yelling, "My head is beeping!" Sydney pushes the stop button just as it reaches 2 seconds, but Anna grabs the briefcase, exits the car and closes and locks the door. She pushes a button and a red liquid chemical begins to spray from the fire sprinklers, soaking and overcoming Sydney. Somehow, this liquid is absorbing Sydney's DNA and as it's collected in a tank under the train car it is downloaded to a computer back at Dr. Pointy Stick's office.
Will is able to get in to Sydney and open the side door for some air, but Anna's back and she's picked up the detonator. She pushes the button and chucks it out the door. Will's head starts beeping again! Sydney grabs Will and they both jump out of the train car and off of a very high bridge into a river, where Sydney finds the detonator and stops it just in time. Completely off the scale impossible but I don't care - I'm just glad Will's head didn't explode.
Will and Sydney are taking Isabelle for a walk in a very nice scene where he tells her that she is not responsible for the bad things that happen to the people in her life. He tells her that he and everyone else who loves her is thankful every day because they know that's she's out there fighting the bad guys and making the world a safer place. Aw. He tells her, "There's only one Sydney Bristow."
Not so fast, Will. It seems that Prophet 5 and Dr. Pointy Stick are putting all that DNA they stole to good use by genetically altering Anna Espinosa, turning her into a Sydney Bristow clone.
Who else thinks that now we can have the Rambaldi prophecy come true and protect Sydney at the same time? Nadia will be cured and she will fight and kill Anna-as-Syd? Works for me.
There's another new episode next Wednesday at 8:00!
"That mail-order cowboy sat on his pimple in the rain, got himself catarrh, and went up the flume."
I turned on HBO last Sunday night, just before The Sopranos was to begin and I saw an ad for Deadwood. Wow, I've missed that show! I've missed Doc and Jane and Al and Wu and Seth and Sol and Trixie...but it won't be long before they're back. Season 3 is set to debut in June (no fixed date yet). If you need to catch up, or just need a refresher, it looks like season 1 is available On Demand. Hopefully they'll also put season 2 up as well as we get closer to the season 3 premiere.
OK, so, you may watch Deadwood, but Do You Speak Cowboy? I apparently do not - I only got a 4 out of 10. Now, if they had said ""That mail-order c*cks*cker sat on his f*cking pimple in the rain, got himself a catarrh, and went the f*ck up the flume," well, that would have been a different story.
OK, so, you may watch Deadwood, but Do You Speak Cowboy? I apparently do not - I only got a 4 out of 10. Now, if they had said ""That mail-order c*cks*cker sat on his f*cking pimple in the rain, got himself a catarrh, and went the f*ck up the flume," well, that would have been a different story.
Why?
SciFi Announces a prequel to Battlestar Galactica: "Caprica would take place more than half a century before the events that play out in Battlestar Galactica. The people of the Twelve Colonies are at peace and living in a society not unlike our own, but where high technology has changed the lives of virtually everyone for the better. "
Why do they have to mess with a good thing?
Why do they have to mess with a good thing?
Idol Results: Cue the commercial and...."CUT!"
That was Kellie's last word on American Idol, yelled just as the end credits finished rolling, and it was perfect. Maybe I was still buzzing from the high of seeing Kellie eliminated, but she was most appealing during her goodbye speech - articulate, charming and much more composed than I would have given her credit for being. Well done, Kellie, and good luck!
I missed the first 5 minutes and so I didn't see Simon's apology to Katharine - damn! I did, however, sit down in front of the TV just in time to see the Happy Dysfunctional Family shot. I can feel the love from here.
Now we have a real competition - Chris, Taylor, Katharine, Elliot and Paris are our remaining contestants. Results night is going to be excruciating from here on in.
From what I gather, next week each contestant will be singing 2 songs: one from the year they were born and one song from any of the Top 10 Billboard charts. And as far as I can tell, it's only on for an hour!
I missed the first 5 minutes and so I didn't see Simon's apology to Katharine - damn! I did, however, sit down in front of the TV just in time to see the Happy Dysfunctional Family shot. I can feel the love from here.
Now we have a real competition - Chris, Taylor, Katharine, Elliot and Paris are our remaining contestants. Results night is going to be excruciating from here on in.
From what I gather, next week each contestant will be singing 2 songs: one from the year they were born and one song from any of the Top 10 Billboard charts. And as far as I can tell, it's only on for an hour!
4.26.2006
"Here - Cover your mother."
Continued from here.
Maternal Instinct
It's OK, honey, Mom and Dad are just having a little difference of opinion.
We open with the Alpha Black guy that Jack beat up and shot up, who is being transported in an ambulance, under guard. A Mack truck comes out of nowhere and slams into the side of the ambulance. They all survive, but not for long. The two guards are immediately dispatched by on off-screen shooter who then knee-caps AlphaBlack as he tries to scurry away. Welcome back, SpyMommy. She wants to know if AlphaBlack told her husband about The Horizon. He swears he didn't and she believes him. And the she kills him. Twice.
Sydney is with her new doctor, who confirms that she and the baby are fine and that the surgery done on her on the ship probably saved them both. Dixon pops his head in and tells her it's time to go. Aw, Dixon's taking her to her appointments. He tells her that Jack has been released from custody because AlphaBlack confessed.
Meanwhile, Devlin has showed up at APO, demanding to see all reports and files relating to the Prophet 5 investigation. He wants to know who leaked the location of AlphaBlack. Hmm, I wonder who that could be? Neither Sloane nor Grace look too pleased about this. In fact, the subplot of this episode centers around Sloane trying to cover his ass with the help of Grace and Rachel. Not much happened there, so we'll just leave it at that.
Syd (along with Dixon) and SpyDaddy meet in secret and hug. They figure out there's a mole (moley-mole-mole-mole!) in APO and decide to continue the Prophet 5 investigation in secret - or "compartmentalized", as Jack would say. It should be mentioned that Dixon is rockin' a new braided 'do. He's always been cool, so I say he pulls it off. Anyway, Syd tells Jack all about how Prophet 5 said they "had plans for" her, and how she gave them the wrong intel on The Horizon. She withheld the real map location, which was "Leo47Norte". Jack and Dixon figure out that it's an operation name and 47Norte was code for Paris. Jack tells Syd to go and pack a bag and get to a safe place, Dixon to go wait in Paris and he'll go back to APO to see if he can figure out the "Leo" part. There's a really nice scene in the car with Syd and Dixon where he tells her she waddles and she denies it and he agrees and says that actually, she teeters.
Syd enters her house alone - you'd think Dixon would have come in and checked it out for her - and who is sitting in her dining room but Lena F*ckin' Olin. She plays Irina so well, and it's really hard to read her expressions in this scene, but I think it's safe to say she's more wicked than ever. She tells Sydney that she came because she heard about Prophet 5 and her kidnapping and that everything will be alright (ha!) and Prophet 5 is looking for something called The Horizon and does Sydney know anything about it? Sydney lies and says no.
Jack's at APO with Marshall and they identify "Leo" as some guy named Jean Bertrand, who headed the Leo47Norte operation and is still in France. Jack tells Marshall to forward Bertrand's location to Dixon in Paris. Then his cell phone rings. It's Sydney. Guess who's coming to dinner, Dad?
We have a nice little SpyFamily reunion at Syd's house and Dixon calls Jack and tells him that he and Renee strapped Jean Bertrand to the hood of his car and hilariously drove around a parking garage at high speed until he cried and told them that the operation entailed delivering a package to a safe deposit box in a bank in Vancouver and that's all he knew. Well, he didn't tell Jack all that, but it's what they did. Jack then proceeds to tell his scheming, deceitful spy of a wife exactly where to find The Horizon. Jack! They need to go to Vancouver to get it, but Syd and SpyDaddy will have trouble getting transportation and contacts and protocols and whatever it is they need for a mission, because Prophet 5 is off-limits, officially. Irina graciously offers to go to Vancouver for them, but they aren't buying it - they will all go together.
Meanwhile, at Prophet 5 HQ, some goon tells Peyton that Irina is going to Vancouver to retrieve The Horizon. Peyton says she trusts her, but will go anyway, just in case.
At Queen's Bank in Vancouver, Syd, Jack and Irina pretend to be a rich, Italian family as a ruse to get to the safe deposit vault. Syd does some spy stuff on a computer and Mom and Dad knock the bank officer unconscious. SpyDaddy retrieves the package from the box, and it's as small as a paperback, is wrapped in old cloth and twine and is wired to self-destruct if anyone tries to unwrap it. Jack turns his back on Irina (Jack!) and she attacks. They fight and Syd walks in. This is not a fight between your parents you want to walk in on. Everything starts to click into place for Syd - her mother was the one who kidnapped her, she is part of Prophet 5 and she used her to get to The Horizon. Well, there's no time for this - the bad guys are on their way up to get them. Jack tells Irina (whose hands are now bound) to call off her team, but she swears they are not there with her and will kill her and take The Horizon. Just then, Sydney goes into labor.
They decide to hoof it up 4 flights of stairs to a helicopter that Irina was going to use for her extraction, by calling it with a beacon she stuffed in her bra and Jack just happened to have to reach in to get it...I'm just saying. Anyway, they get to the top and Peyton freakin' blows the helicopter out of the sky with a surface-to-air missile thing that she shoots from a lower floor. They come back inside and Jack gives Sydney his pistol and delivers the best line of the night: "Here - cover your mother." Syd and Irina go hide in an empty office while Jack heads off to dispatch the baddies. He does so with minimal effort but doesn't double-check his work - Peyton will live to see another assasination. While Jack was gone, Syd and Irina had a heart-to-heart, and Irina told her that she never wanted to have her. Ouch. But then she said that once she held her, she knew she had made a big mistake. You can't be a good mother and a good spy. She chose to be a good spy. Also, Syd accused her of wanting to take the baby and of killing Vaughn. Irina doesn't outright deny either accusation.
Sydney's really in pain now, the baby's close, but so is a bad guy and Syd has to give her mother the gun. Irina kills the bad guy, unties her hands and is about to leave with The Horizon when she looks back at Sydney. She approaches her and tells her that the only reason she saved the baby was because Sydney was her daughter. She decides to stay to help deliver the baby. Aw.
Jack returns and poor Sydney is an absolute mess and the baby is breech. Despite that, Sydney manages to push twice and deliver a perfectly healthy baby in about 3 minutes, which is ridiculous and absolutley par for the course with this show. As unbelievable as it may have been, that scene had me in tears with the Jack/Sydney stuff. Anyhoo, Syd has a girl, of course, and after she hands her the baby, Irina disappears. Don't worry, Jack says, we'll catch up to her.
She didn't abandon them completely - she calls Marshall and tells him that Jack and Sydney will need an extraction - and diapers. On the flight home, Sydney and Jack coo over the baby - I wonder what they will call her? - and Sydney gives Jack a knowing look and slight smile. Jack says, "I'll take care of it." Cut to Bhutan (Wikipedia says it's the most isolated country in the world) and a man on a horse delivers a message to a man who looks to be a monk. The monk closes the door and walks deeper into his house and tells someone offscreen the he has good news - you have a daughter. Hi Vaughn!
More Alias tonight at 8:00 PM on ABC.
Maternal Instinct
It's OK, honey, Mom and Dad are just having a little difference of opinion.
We open with the Alpha Black guy that Jack beat up and shot up, who is being transported in an ambulance, under guard. A Mack truck comes out of nowhere and slams into the side of the ambulance. They all survive, but not for long. The two guards are immediately dispatched by on off-screen shooter who then knee-caps AlphaBlack as he tries to scurry away. Welcome back, SpyMommy. She wants to know if AlphaBlack told her husband about The Horizon. He swears he didn't and she believes him. And the she kills him. Twice.
Sydney is with her new doctor, who confirms that she and the baby are fine and that the surgery done on her on the ship probably saved them both. Dixon pops his head in and tells her it's time to go. Aw, Dixon's taking her to her appointments. He tells her that Jack has been released from custody because AlphaBlack confessed.
Meanwhile, Devlin has showed up at APO, demanding to see all reports and files relating to the Prophet 5 investigation. He wants to know who leaked the location of AlphaBlack. Hmm, I wonder who that could be? Neither Sloane nor Grace look too pleased about this. In fact, the subplot of this episode centers around Sloane trying to cover his ass with the help of Grace and Rachel. Not much happened there, so we'll just leave it at that.
Syd (along with Dixon) and SpyDaddy meet in secret and hug. They figure out there's a mole (moley-mole-mole-mole!) in APO and decide to continue the Prophet 5 investigation in secret - or "compartmentalized", as Jack would say. It should be mentioned that Dixon is rockin' a new braided 'do. He's always been cool, so I say he pulls it off. Anyway, Syd tells Jack all about how Prophet 5 said they "had plans for" her, and how she gave them the wrong intel on The Horizon. She withheld the real map location, which was "Leo47Norte". Jack and Dixon figure out that it's an operation name and 47Norte was code for Paris. Jack tells Syd to go and pack a bag and get to a safe place, Dixon to go wait in Paris and he'll go back to APO to see if he can figure out the "Leo" part. There's a really nice scene in the car with Syd and Dixon where he tells her she waddles and she denies it and he agrees and says that actually, she teeters.
Syd enters her house alone - you'd think Dixon would have come in and checked it out for her - and who is sitting in her dining room but Lena F*ckin' Olin. She plays Irina so well, and it's really hard to read her expressions in this scene, but I think it's safe to say she's more wicked than ever. She tells Sydney that she came because she heard about Prophet 5 and her kidnapping and that everything will be alright (ha!) and Prophet 5 is looking for something called The Horizon and does Sydney know anything about it? Sydney lies and says no.
Jack's at APO with Marshall and they identify "Leo" as some guy named Jean Bertrand, who headed the Leo47Norte operation and is still in France. Jack tells Marshall to forward Bertrand's location to Dixon in Paris. Then his cell phone rings. It's Sydney. Guess who's coming to dinner, Dad?
We have a nice little SpyFamily reunion at Syd's house and Dixon calls Jack and tells him that he and Renee strapped Jean Bertrand to the hood of his car and hilariously drove around a parking garage at high speed until he cried and told them that the operation entailed delivering a package to a safe deposit box in a bank in Vancouver and that's all he knew. Well, he didn't tell Jack all that, but it's what they did. Jack then proceeds to tell his scheming, deceitful spy of a wife exactly where to find The Horizon. Jack! They need to go to Vancouver to get it, but Syd and SpyDaddy will have trouble getting transportation and contacts and protocols and whatever it is they need for a mission, because Prophet 5 is off-limits, officially. Irina graciously offers to go to Vancouver for them, but they aren't buying it - they will all go together.
Meanwhile, at Prophet 5 HQ, some goon tells Peyton that Irina is going to Vancouver to retrieve The Horizon. Peyton says she trusts her, but will go anyway, just in case.
At Queen's Bank in Vancouver, Syd, Jack and Irina pretend to be a rich, Italian family as a ruse to get to the safe deposit vault. Syd does some spy stuff on a computer and Mom and Dad knock the bank officer unconscious. SpyDaddy retrieves the package from the box, and it's as small as a paperback, is wrapped in old cloth and twine and is wired to self-destruct if anyone tries to unwrap it. Jack turns his back on Irina (Jack!) and she attacks. They fight and Syd walks in. This is not a fight between your parents you want to walk in on. Everything starts to click into place for Syd - her mother was the one who kidnapped her, she is part of Prophet 5 and she used her to get to The Horizon. Well, there's no time for this - the bad guys are on their way up to get them. Jack tells Irina (whose hands are now bound) to call off her team, but she swears they are not there with her and will kill her and take The Horizon. Just then, Sydney goes into labor.
They decide to hoof it up 4 flights of stairs to a helicopter that Irina was going to use for her extraction, by calling it with a beacon she stuffed in her bra and Jack just happened to have to reach in to get it...I'm just saying. Anyway, they get to the top and Peyton freakin' blows the helicopter out of the sky with a surface-to-air missile thing that she shoots from a lower floor. They come back inside and Jack gives Sydney his pistol and delivers the best line of the night: "Here - cover your mother." Syd and Irina go hide in an empty office while Jack heads off to dispatch the baddies. He does so with minimal effort but doesn't double-check his work - Peyton will live to see another assasination. While Jack was gone, Syd and Irina had a heart-to-heart, and Irina told her that she never wanted to have her. Ouch. But then she said that once she held her, she knew she had made a big mistake. You can't be a good mother and a good spy. She chose to be a good spy. Also, Syd accused her of wanting to take the baby and of killing Vaughn. Irina doesn't outright deny either accusation.
Sydney's really in pain now, the baby's close, but so is a bad guy and Syd has to give her mother the gun. Irina kills the bad guy, unties her hands and is about to leave with The Horizon when she looks back at Sydney. She approaches her and tells her that the only reason she saved the baby was because Sydney was her daughter. She decides to stay to help deliver the baby. Aw.
Jack returns and poor Sydney is an absolute mess and the baby is breech. Despite that, Sydney manages to push twice and deliver a perfectly healthy baby in about 3 minutes, which is ridiculous and absolutley par for the course with this show. As unbelievable as it may have been, that scene had me in tears with the Jack/Sydney stuff. Anyhoo, Syd has a girl, of course, and after she hands her the baby, Irina disappears. Don't worry, Jack says, we'll catch up to her.
She didn't abandon them completely - she calls Marshall and tells him that Jack and Sydney will need an extraction - and diapers. On the flight home, Sydney and Jack coo over the baby - I wonder what they will call her? - and Sydney gives Jack a knowing look and slight smile. Jack says, "I'll take care of it." Cut to Bhutan (Wikipedia says it's the most isolated country in the world) and a man on a horse delivers a message to a man who looks to be a monk. The monk closes the door and walks deeper into his house and tells someone offscreen the he has good news - you have a daughter. Hi Vaughn!
More Alias tonight at 8:00 PM on ABC.
Idol Top 6: The Pills Kick In.
Who else thinks that was the weirdest night so far this season? A night whose defining moment, I think, was the spectacle of Paula completely losing her shit. Awesome! Simon seemed to be enjoying the meltdown as well. I have to say, however, that I have about had it with the judges' bickering, between themselves and with Ryan. It's a waste of time and makes them look completely unprofessional. Oh, who the hell am I kidding? Look who I'm talking about!
So, our guest this week was Andrea Bocelli and producer David Foster. Foster's apparently a complete prick, but I do think he gave the singers some good advice.
Things do not start off well.
Katharine not only sings in the dreaded first position, but she is wearing a big yellow dress that's gorgeous from the waist up and a VPL nightmare from the waist down. The wardrobe miscalculation worsens when the slit in the skirt pops open and we see London, we see France. Worst of all, however, is the absolutely baseless thrashing she gets from the judges. What's going on here? I thought she did a wonderful job and I don't understand what all that harshness was about.
Next up, Elliot, who called Ryan before the show to see what he was wearing. That boy just looks better and better with each passing week, doesn't he? I didn't know that song, but I could tell he sounded great. Not quite "make-me-cry" great, Paula, but maybe that's just me.
Oh Kellie, Kellie, Kellie. The pre-performance chat with Ryan was a blatant sales pitch, the pompadour is not a good look and even Bocelli knew you were a blonde. All of that would be irrelevant, however, if you could actually sing. Alas...
Paris, who hasn't had any "love thoughts" yet, impresses the hell out of Bocelli and Foster, channels Gladys Knight and sings the hell out of "The Way We Were", and will probably go home.
Taylor was off last night. Simon was right, he looked uncomfortable up there. I thought that was a pretty good song choice for his voice, but it was just an average performance.
Bringing up the rear, we had Chris in the pimp spot, yet again. You all know I am not a big Chris fan, and he still looked like he wanted to reach down through my throat and rip my heart out because that's what it's like when you really love a woman, but I have to admit that he did a great job with a crappy song.
OK, so...Bottom 3? If I could, I'd put Simon, Randy and Paula there, but I can't so I say the Bottom 3 will be Kellie, Paris and Katharine. Find out tonight at 9:00 (not 9:30 as I erroneously posted last week - sorry!)
So, our guest this week was Andrea Bocelli and producer David Foster. Foster's apparently a complete prick, but I do think he gave the singers some good advice.
Things do not start off well.
Katharine not only sings in the dreaded first position, but she is wearing a big yellow dress that's gorgeous from the waist up and a VPL nightmare from the waist down. The wardrobe miscalculation worsens when the slit in the skirt pops open and we see London, we see France. Worst of all, however, is the absolutely baseless thrashing she gets from the judges. What's going on here? I thought she did a wonderful job and I don't understand what all that harshness was about.
Next up, Elliot, who called Ryan before the show to see what he was wearing. That boy just looks better and better with each passing week, doesn't he? I didn't know that song, but I could tell he sounded great. Not quite "make-me-cry" great, Paula, but maybe that's just me.
Oh Kellie, Kellie, Kellie. The pre-performance chat with Ryan was a blatant sales pitch, the pompadour is not a good look and even Bocelli knew you were a blonde. All of that would be irrelevant, however, if you could actually sing. Alas...
Paris, who hasn't had any "love thoughts" yet, impresses the hell out of Bocelli and Foster, channels Gladys Knight and sings the hell out of "The Way We Were", and will probably go home.
Taylor was off last night. Simon was right, he looked uncomfortable up there. I thought that was a pretty good song choice for his voice, but it was just an average performance.
Bringing up the rear, we had Chris in the pimp spot, yet again. You all know I am not a big Chris fan, and he still looked like he wanted to reach down through my throat and rip my heart out because that's what it's like when you really love a woman, but I have to admit that he did a great job with a crappy song.
OK, so...Bottom 3? If I could, I'd put Simon, Randy and Paula there, but I can't so I say the Bottom 3 will be Kellie, Paris and Katharine. Find out tonight at 9:00 (not 9:30 as I erroneously posted last week - sorry!)
4.25.2006
The Spy Has Come In From The Cold.
S.O.S/Maternal Instinct
The Bristows are back, and it gives me great joy to say that. I am going to do my best to recap and comment on these final episodes of Alias, a show that's near and dear to my heart. It's the least I can do.
Hopefully, I will be able to do them in a more timely manner than I have with this one. Real life's a bitch.
S.O.S opens right where we left off, with an extremely pregnant Sydney stranded on the deck of a container ship out in the Middle of Nowhere Sea. She's not alone for long, as Peyton and her goons start chasing her around. Syd manages to get an SOS message out over the radio, but she's not feeling too well. She gets the jump on Peyton and they hide in what appears to be a delivery room, something I don't think is standard on a container ship. Syd wonders WTF is going on but before she can get an answer she is overcome with pain and Peyton gets the gun from her.
Back at APO, Marshall and Jack listen to Syd's SOS signal but before they can get a location, it's interrupted, corrupted, and deleted. Jack decides they need to break into CIA heaquarters to retrieve the SOS from one of their computers. This is clearly treason, but no one has a problem with it. Dixon, Marshall, Rachel and Tom do the breaking and entering. There are alarms set off, lockdowns put into place and Rachel runs right into a door. Ha! Bottom line, they have to take an entire hard drive back to APO. In order to get everyone out of the building, Jack calls in Weiss, who has to miss his Pilates class to help out. Hi Weiss! Also, while there, Tom did a little moonlighting and accessed the Witness Protection database and retrieved the name and location of the man who killed his wife. Hmm.
Sydney awakes on the container ship to find she is strapped to the table in the delivery room with a fetal monitor on her belly. The baby is lighting up like a Christmas tree on the monitor screen. No one will tell her what's going on. A doctor comes into the room and who should it be but Syd's own OB/GYN. Bitch! Dr. Bitch takes some amniotic fluid, finds blood in it and says they have to do the procedure right away. Procedure? What procedure? Will someone tell me what is going on?
Back at APO, bad news - the hard drive is too encrypted and they can't get the message off of it. Marshall, however, waves his geeky hands in the air and voila! The person who intercepted the message has Alpha Black clearance. There only 7 people in the CIA who have that level of clearance and they all have special cell phones. I know, but wait, it'll make sense. SpyDaddy has an idea. Jack calls all these Alpha Black dudes into one conference room and starts doing an awesome Hercule Poirot routine, albeit a little bit more badass than HP usually is, saying that one of them knows where Sydney is and he's going to find out who that is. Or else. And when Jack says "or else", he means it. Marshall does his thing with the thing and locks in on the cellphone in question and it rings. Bam! Jack shoots the guy whose phone is ringing. Whoa! "Where is Sydney?" He's not telling. Pow! Jack pistol-whips the guy. "Where's Sydney?!" He doesn't know! BAM! Jacks shoots the guys again. "Where is Sydney?" Oh OK, she's on a container ship called the Athena in the North Atlantic.
Meanwhile, Peyton chats with someone on the phone who tells her that Sydney gave them the wrong information while under hypnosis.
They locate the ship and Tom and Dixon and the rescue team land on deck, only to find the ship deserted. Except for poor Sydney, still strapped to the delivery table, apparently post-op. They airlift her out of there. Then we cut to Tom watching the guy who killed his wife (Allen Korman, I think) walking through a parking garage. Tom approaches him. Just when you think Tom's going to kill him, he addresses Korman in a foreign language (Russian, perhaps?), and tells the guy that he needs to get a message to "The Cardinal." Oh, and Korman calls him Peter. Hmm.
This first hour ends with Jack visiting Sydney in her hospital room, accampanied by armed guards. Syd wants to know what's up with the guys, but Jack tells her not to worry. And he confirms to her that the baby is fine and that the operation on the ship was in fact for a placental abruption and they actually saved her and the baby.
And that was the first hour. We still don't know what The Horizon is or why Prophet 5 wants it. Or even who Prophet 5 (or The Cardinal) is. Let's continue the second hour in another post.
The Bristows are back, and it gives me great joy to say that. I am going to do my best to recap and comment on these final episodes of Alias, a show that's near and dear to my heart. It's the least I can do.
Hopefully, I will be able to do them in a more timely manner than I have with this one. Real life's a bitch.
S.O.S opens right where we left off, with an extremely pregnant Sydney stranded on the deck of a container ship out in the Middle of Nowhere Sea. She's not alone for long, as Peyton and her goons start chasing her around. Syd manages to get an SOS message out over the radio, but she's not feeling too well. She gets the jump on Peyton and they hide in what appears to be a delivery room, something I don't think is standard on a container ship. Syd wonders WTF is going on but before she can get an answer she is overcome with pain and Peyton gets the gun from her.
Back at APO, Marshall and Jack listen to Syd's SOS signal but before they can get a location, it's interrupted, corrupted, and deleted. Jack decides they need to break into CIA heaquarters to retrieve the SOS from one of their computers. This is clearly treason, but no one has a problem with it. Dixon, Marshall, Rachel and Tom do the breaking and entering. There are alarms set off, lockdowns put into place and Rachel runs right into a door. Ha! Bottom line, they have to take an entire hard drive back to APO. In order to get everyone out of the building, Jack calls in Weiss, who has to miss his Pilates class to help out. Hi Weiss! Also, while there, Tom did a little moonlighting and accessed the Witness Protection database and retrieved the name and location of the man who killed his wife. Hmm.
Sydney awakes on the container ship to find she is strapped to the table in the delivery room with a fetal monitor on her belly. The baby is lighting up like a Christmas tree on the monitor screen. No one will tell her what's going on. A doctor comes into the room and who should it be but Syd's own OB/GYN. Bitch! Dr. Bitch takes some amniotic fluid, finds blood in it and says they have to do the procedure right away. Procedure? What procedure? Will someone tell me what is going on?
Back at APO, bad news - the hard drive is too encrypted and they can't get the message off of it. Marshall, however, waves his geeky hands in the air and voila! The person who intercepted the message has Alpha Black clearance. There only 7 people in the CIA who have that level of clearance and they all have special cell phones. I know, but wait, it'll make sense. SpyDaddy has an idea. Jack calls all these Alpha Black dudes into one conference room and starts doing an awesome Hercule Poirot routine, albeit a little bit more badass than HP usually is, saying that one of them knows where Sydney is and he's going to find out who that is. Or else. And when Jack says "or else", he means it. Marshall does his thing with the thing and locks in on the cellphone in question and it rings. Bam! Jack shoots the guy whose phone is ringing. Whoa! "Where is Sydney?" He's not telling. Pow! Jack pistol-whips the guy. "Where's Sydney?!" He doesn't know! BAM! Jacks shoots the guys again. "Where is Sydney?" Oh OK, she's on a container ship called the Athena in the North Atlantic.
Meanwhile, Peyton chats with someone on the phone who tells her that Sydney gave them the wrong information while under hypnosis.
They locate the ship and Tom and Dixon and the rescue team land on deck, only to find the ship deserted. Except for poor Sydney, still strapped to the delivery table, apparently post-op. They airlift her out of there. Then we cut to Tom watching the guy who killed his wife (Allen Korman, I think) walking through a parking garage. Tom approaches him. Just when you think Tom's going to kill him, he addresses Korman in a foreign language (Russian, perhaps?), and tells the guy that he needs to get a message to "The Cardinal." Oh, and Korman calls him Peter. Hmm.
This first hour ends with Jack visiting Sydney in her hospital room, accampanied by armed guards. Syd wants to know what's up with the guys, but Jack tells her not to worry. And he confirms to her that the baby is fine and that the operation on the ship was in fact for a placental abruption and they actually saved her and the baby.
And that was the first hour. We still don't know what The Horizon is or why Prophet 5 wants it. Or even who Prophet 5 (or The Cardinal) is. Let's continue the second hour in another post.
4.24.2006
4.20.2006
Idol Results: Ding Dong Ace is GONE.
All together now! Ding, dong, the wimpy Ace is Goooooooone!
Ace says, "This is my time!"
Gina says, "This is your time to go home."
Hey, I made my first correct Bottom 3 prediction! It was a no-brainer, but hey, yay for me!
Was Taylor pissed about having to do that choice thing, or what? Holy crap. I thought he aquitted himself nicely, however, making the best of a bad situation. I was very pleased that Elliot did as well as he did. Someone else, who's name I won't mention, should not have been where she was but I'm so tired of complaining about her, and her continued presence is such an inevitability, I won't even bother going there.
Next week: the "world's greatest love songs" and Andrea Bocelli. Oy.
Ace says, "This is my time!"
Gina says, "This is your time to go home."
Hey, I made my first correct Bottom 3 prediction! It was a no-brainer, but hey, yay for me!
Was Taylor pissed about having to do that choice thing, or what? Holy crap. I thought he aquitted himself nicely, however, making the best of a bad situation. I was very pleased that Elliot did as well as he did. Someone else, who's name I won't mention, should not have been where she was but I'm so tired of complaining about her, and her continued presence is such an inevitability, I won't even bother going there.
Next week: the "world's greatest love songs" and Andrea Bocelli. Oy.
4.19.2006
From Birth, Mortal Enemies Bound Together In Eternal Struggle for the Fate of Humanity.
Tom and Katie Welcome Daughter Suri: "In a strange twist of fate, Suri was born on the same day Brooke Shields gave birth to her daughter, Grier Hammond Henchy. Shields and Cruise had a public spat last year after he criticized the actress for taking antidepressants following the birth of her first child."
Idol Top 7: They Call 'Em Standards For A Reason.
Well, well, I had almost forgotten that these people can actually sing. Most of them, that is.
Did Rod Stewart have anything to do with the overall excellence? Or was it the songs? I love Rod Stewart but I think for the most part, it was the songs. They aren't included in the Great American Songbook for nothin'.
We started off with Chris, looking like Gene Kelly in a motorcycle gang. Nice ascot, man! He sounded very nice. Incongruously, he looked like he wanted to kill me. Chris, why are you so angry with me when the world is so wonderful? Dude needed to bring the intensity level down a notch or two for that song. Still, well done.
Ryan has been sneaking sips from Paula's cup hasn't he? "Simon dressed up like the Easter Bunny and laid eggs at my house"? WTF?
Paris reminded me of why I liked her so much at the beginning. She was amazing and looked very pretty (even if the suit was a little too "Julie McCoy"). Again, well done!
Ryan obviously told Taylor that Paula was sharing because "Flattery is a great form of humor"? Whoa! Regardless, he nails You Send Me, especially the end.
Elliot (or Idi Yamin as Sheila likes to call him) looks better than ever, sings well, has a little fun with his stage presence and Simon tells him he lacks personality. Go figure. I think Simon is using reverse psychology and criticized Elliot in the hope that his fans will respond by power voting for Idi.
Wow, everyone's doing so well...
Heh, that was fun while it lasted. Kellie crashes and burns with "Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered (hee!)". Actually, she started off sounding remarkably good; however, it all went very wrong about halfway through as she got ahead of the band and couldn't carry a note if it had a handle. Oh the humanity! However, as much as I wish she was out of the competition, I give her serious props for owning that disaster and acknowledging that she farked it up.
Hey look! It's Vinnie Barbarino in Pulp Fiction! No wait, that's Ace. I don't really want to talk about him or his lip quiver at the end.
Katharine gets the pimp spot and blows away the competition. Exquisite.
Do I hazard a guess at the Bottom 3? How about Ace, Paris, and Kellie or Chris as the shocker!
I'll be happy if either Ace of Kellie go home. Results tonight at 9:30 on FOX.
Did Rod Stewart have anything to do with the overall excellence? Or was it the songs? I love Rod Stewart but I think for the most part, it was the songs. They aren't included in the Great American Songbook for nothin'.
We started off with Chris, looking like Gene Kelly in a motorcycle gang. Nice ascot, man! He sounded very nice. Incongruously, he looked like he wanted to kill me. Chris, why are you so angry with me when the world is so wonderful? Dude needed to bring the intensity level down a notch or two for that song. Still, well done.
Ryan has been sneaking sips from Paula's cup hasn't he? "Simon dressed up like the Easter Bunny and laid eggs at my house"? WTF?
Paris reminded me of why I liked her so much at the beginning. She was amazing and looked very pretty (even if the suit was a little too "Julie McCoy"). Again, well done!
Ryan obviously told Taylor that Paula was sharing because "Flattery is a great form of humor"? Whoa! Regardless, he nails You Send Me, especially the end.
Elliot (or Idi Yamin as Sheila likes to call him) looks better than ever, sings well, has a little fun with his stage presence and Simon tells him he lacks personality. Go figure. I think Simon is using reverse psychology and criticized Elliot in the hope that his fans will respond by power voting for Idi.
Wow, everyone's doing so well...
Heh, that was fun while it lasted. Kellie crashes and burns with "Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered (hee!)". Actually, she started off sounding remarkably good; however, it all went very wrong about halfway through as she got ahead of the band and couldn't carry a note if it had a handle. Oh the humanity! However, as much as I wish she was out of the competition, I give her serious props for owning that disaster and acknowledging that she farked it up.
Hey look! It's Vinnie Barbarino in Pulp Fiction! No wait, that's Ace. I don't really want to talk about him or his lip quiver at the end.
Katharine gets the pimp spot and blows away the competition. Exquisite.
Do I hazard a guess at the Bottom 3? How about Ace, Paris, and Kellie or Chris as the shocker!
I'll be happy if either Ace of Kellie go home. Results tonight at 9:30 on FOX.
4.18.2006
When last we saw her...
Heads up, people! Tomorrow night brings us the beginning of the end for Sydney Bristow with a 2 hour return of Alias on ABC at 8:00.The show's been off the schedule for so long, I recommend reading TWoP's recap of the last new episode to get a feel for where we left off. I haven't done so (yet), but the best that my addled brain can recall is that a very pregnant Sydney had been kidnapped and drugged by her mother (!), who was in cahoots with the assasin girl who worked with Gordon. Damn, I can't remember her name! Something with a "P".
Anyway, drugged-up Sydney was reliving her memories as a "doctor" guided her with a pointy electrical stick. The purpose? To acquire information that was on an SD-6 map way back when she was first brought to the CIA by Vaughn. Once the information was retrieved, Sydney escaped her torture chamber only to find that she was stranded on a container ship in the middle of some ocean. Also: SpyDaddy and Renee found a very creepy nursery room somewhere after SpyDaddy got all medieval on Renee's father and cut his ear off. Good stuff.
This is the final season for Alias and I have a feeling that JJ Abrahams and his crew are going to be pulling out all the stops for the conclusion of this story. If you've ever been a fan of the show, you won't want to miss it.
He started off in the back seat.
He started off in the back seat.
Originally uploaded by gina64.
But there's no keeping him from his mommy. This was taken on Easter Sunday, on the way home from my sister's in Rhode Island. He was exhausted from the long car ride the day before, the lack of any substantial napping time, the two kids and two other dogs at the house, the late night and the fact that he didn't sleep a wink all night. But he'd rather sleep sitting up if it means he can be next to Sheila.
God, they're getting so big.
God, they're getting so big.
Originally uploaded by gina64.
My niece and nephew. Hannah is 10 now and Zachary is 6. They grow up too fast!
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