Idol: Top 8 Guys

As Simon would say, that was ghastly. This week's theme: each contestant tells us something we didn't know about them. I can't imagine Antonella will have anything left to tell.

Blake - Loves Halloween and likes to make believe he's someone called Jimmy Walker Blue. It's scary and I think he just lost the southern white trash vote. He sings some 311 song. I love the way he sings, but not the beatboxing. Whenever he does that he sounds that guy from the Police Academy movies and that's not a good thing, in my eyes. The judges love him.

Sanjaya's secret is that he can hula...I'm sorry, I'm not going to take the bait. He sings John Mayer's "Waiting on the World to Change". Better than last week but still really lackluster and BORING and bad. But he'll be back next week.

Sundance is actually thin in real life and wears a fat suit on American Idol. Huh. He sings "Jeremy" by Pearl Jam and he sounds awful. And so did the band. I don't think it suited his voice at all.

Chris R. used to be a fat football player (could these "secrets" be any duller?). He sings the same Keith Urban song that Ace sang last year and God, I HATE his voice. The judges love him.

Jared - His secret: played college basketball but quit to be a singer. *yawn* God, he's singing Stevie Wonder's "If You Really Love Me", prompting Sheila to say, "He's going home." It's actually not that bad vocally, but he's so pointy and graspy and, well, white.

Brandon - Finally, an interesting secret: He's a classical piano player, and seems to be quite good. His song is "I Just Wanna Celebrate", which I think is a great song choice, and he sounds good, but he looks uneasy and doesn't have much of a stage presence. Methinks Brandon was born to be a backup singer.

Phil's big secret? He used to have long hair but then he shaved it off. Good God, these guys! Anyway, dude needs to grow it long again because between the bald head, the eyes, the hats - it's just not working. He sings Leann Rimes' "I Need You" and whoa! The beginning is freaky! "I Need Brains" is more like it! Very odd song choice and it's kind of weird all around. He hits some good notes but overall it's not very good.

Chris S. - His secret: he used to have very short hair. Fine, whatever. He thoundths awethome but I think he made a mithtake picking a thong that no one knowth.

So, all in all, pretty awful. Tonight at 8:00 we get the Top 8 girls and Carrie Underwood is performing on tomorrow night's results show. Oh, and there's supposed to some big Idol accouncement made tomorrow night, too, so you won't want to miss that.